I Don’t Want This Reincarnation

“Ya… what are you doing now?”

“What do you mean?”

Cheon Sa-yeon clearly understood what I was saying, but pretended he didn’t know. Disgusting bastard.

“Let go. Now is not the time for this.”

“The time for this?”

Cheon Sa-yeon who followed my words literally smiled as he wrapped his hands around my waist.

“What do you mean by the time for this? I have no intention of doing anything else.”

“Crazy…”

I swore and pushed the clinging Cheon Sa-yeon hard with my arm, but the guy didn’t even budge. I was just using my strength for nothing.

‘Here again.’

I sighed as I recalled that Cheon Sa-yeon had acted similarly several times in the past before.

I gave up pushing him and relaxed my body. I didn’t have time to wrestle with this now.

“Cheon Sa-yeon, about this drug case.”

“Say it.”

“You said it was your first time.”

If he had known that the drugs would spread, Cheon Sa-yeon wouldn’t have stood still.

“Then what about Doctor? You didn’t even know that man existed?”

“……”

Cheon Sa-yeon didn’t answer any of my questions. After staring at him for a while, I came to a conclusion.

He knew. Then it was clear that Doctor was the main character, just like Samael and Abel.

“What they are doing in America… you don’t know this part too?”

“Well.”

Cheon Sa-yeon gave only a vague reply. I asked again in frustration.

“Tell me for sure. That way we can decide how to move forward.”

“……”

“You’re not going to hide it again, are you? You know it means nothing. The Praus Cult is now…”

“Right.”

Cheon Sa-yeon pulled my shoulder and bowed his head. Faced with the cold hand on my cheek and his face approaching right in front of me, I bit my lips.

“Problems that I have never been encountered before continue to arise. The drug case and the time when Doctor appeared… nothing matches with the past.”

Cheon Sa-yeon’s voice was unwavering and calm, but the content wasn’t.

Cheon Sa-yeon, who left everything to me and took a step back while the drug case was resolved. I wondered what kind of eyes he was watching this incident.

“You mean you don’t even know what’s going on in America?”

“Is that important?”

“It’s important.”

Without avoiding Cheon Sa-yeon’s gaze, I said firmly.

“In this situation, that’s the most important thing.”

“You’re going to America yourself.”

“That’s, of course…”

As I answered, I noticed the expression on Cheon Sa-yeon’s expression that was different from usual. I slowly grabbed the wrist of the guy who was holding my cheek and made eye contact.

“Cheon Sa-yeon. If you have something you want to say, say it properly.”

“Something I want to say?”

“You are doing this because you have complaints, now. Do I see you in a day or two?”

Cheon Sa-yeon raised the corners of his lips slightly as if it was funny.

“I have complaints. It’s true that I don’t feel very good.”

“What do you mean?”

“It means I don’t know what the problem is.”

Cheon Sa-yeon gently stroked my right eye with the tip of his finger.

“I just ask you one question. Han Yi-gyeol, the reason you are so involved in the Praus Cult… is it because they are after you?”

“…….”

“Is there any other reason besides that?”

I narrowed my eyebrows at the unexpected words. Other reason.

‘I think he has noticed a bit.’

If Cheon Sa-yeon failed again to defeat the Praus Cult and loses to Kali, if time went back again, I wouldn’t be able to enter Han Yi-gyeol’s body and disappear as it was.

As Elohim explained, there was a great risk that not only I would disappear, but this world would also end. In many ways, it was clear that this was the last chance.

However… I didn’t really want to tell Cheon Sa-yeon. From what I had seen from him so far, he seemed to know that the world was in an unstable state, but it was clear that he didn’t know that I would disappear.

‘If I tell him now, it will only cause confusion.’

The drug problem must be properly settled and the whereabouts of the producers who had been taken to America must be investigated. In a situation where there was so much work to do, there was no need to talk about problems that couldn’t be solved right away.

After thinking about it, I removed Cheon Sa-yeon’s hand from my face and answered.

“Is there any other reason? You must have heard what Doctor said from Woo Seo-hyuk-ssi, right? While I was in China, the Praus Cult was looking for me. So, we can’t let our guard down in the future.”

Cheon Sa-yeon looked down at my hand for a moment and raised one eyebrow.

“Is that really it?”

“Yeah. Unless we completely eliminate the Praus Cult, it will continue to be dangerous. You know it well, Cheon Sa-yeon.”

As the conversation between me and Cheon Sa-yeon gradually intensified, Fox sitting on the opposite sofa lowered his body and whined.

“You have to prepare in advance to avoid being attacked again like last time. So, if you know something, don’t hide it anymore and say it properly… ugh!”

He grabbed my shoulder in an instant and the strong force swung my upper body backwards as I fell to the sofa.

“…what are you doing?”

It wasn’t painful or anything, but it felt awful. Why is this kid talking well?

‘I’m not surprised now that I was bullied.’

How did we get to this point… I smiled and looked up at Cheon Sa-yeon then my shoulders stiffened.

“……”

“…Cheon Sa-yeon.”

Cheon Sa-yeon, with a bitter smile and distorted face, slowly wrapped his large hand around my neck.

Why are you making that face? What did I do?

“You’re right, Han Yi-gyeol.”

Tension surged from the cold sensation in my neck. Unlike before, when his pressure was so suffocating, his hand, gently stroking my skin, slowly turned back.

Cheon Sa-yeon persistently rubbed the area behind and under my left ear, where the art inventory that Ha Tae-heon gave me was engraved.

“You know enough about the Praus Cult, so there’s no need to hide it.”

“……”

“But that doesn’t mean I have to give you an answer. If you want to get something from me, you have to pay the price.”

“You want to make a deal?”

“Do you not like it?”

I didn’t like it and there was nothing I could do about it. I was already used to hearing that from Cheon Sa-yeon.

‘If you think about it, even when we met in a dream before…’

Cheon Sa-yeon chose to use it rather than restore the relationship. Elohim said he couldn’t help it because he had been alone for so long, but…

Let’s think soberly. Cheon Sa-yeon, he seemed to want that too.

“Good. I’d rather be comfortable doing that. Tell me the price.”

As soon as the deal was accepted, Cheon Sa-yeon opened his mouth with an expressionless face as if he was wearing a mask.

“Put the shackles back on, Han Yi-gyeol.”

“What?”

“Stay in shackles and stay here. I will go to America alone.”

All the thoughts that had filled my head with unimaginable demands suddenly stopped. I couldn’t believe it, so I looked at Cheon Sa-yeon.

A face with no emotion. Black eyes staring at me.

“…are you serious?”

“Yeah.”

“What can you do when you go to America alone? How am I supposed to accept such a crap deal?”

“Then give up the information.”

At the cold answer, hot emotions surged from within. I bit my lip, feeling a sharp pain piercing my heart. The determination to remain calm was already swept away by the waves and disappeared without leaving a trace.

Why do you keep talking like this? Why are you going to America alone? Did you feel nothing while solving this drug case? I’m really helping you.

“Cheon Sa-yeon, why do you…”

not believe me?

The inner feelings that couldn’t come out to the end were scattered in vain. Only when you got out of this hellish bondage could I live… what would be different if I said this? You had already rejected my hand.

“…you said you would use it.”

His black eyes fluttered wildly as I spoke and slapped Cheon Sa-yeon’s arm roughly.

It wasn’t that I didn’t understand Cheon Sa-yeon. He had a lot of similarities with me. Not being able to trust someone easily led to self-destructive behaviour.

I didn’t know what kind of life Cheon Sa-yeon lived. All I knew was that he was struggling even at this moment.

However… I’m a human too after all. The cold attitude that Cheon Sa-yeon, who became destined for the same fate, showed me… was inevitably sad.

“You chose to use me. If you do, keep the line.”

“……”

“It doesn’t matter what the situation is, as long as I can only deal with the Praus Cult. So…”

“Don’t make it sounds easy.”

Cheon Sa-yeon’s voice, which cut off my words firmly, was too harsh and dry.

“I made… that choice…”

Cheon Sa-yeon, who pulled away from me, muttering an unknown word and hurriedly covered his face with his hands. The way he got up from the sofa and opened the distance to me was like a lost child.

“…Cheon Sa-yeon.”

Even when I called, he didn’t show his face until the end and turned around. I couldn’t bear to catch Cheon Sa-yeon who was about to leave the room.

Hearing the sound of the front door opening and closing, I raised my upper body. Fox, who had been wary of Cheon Sa-yeon with his hair upright, ran to me and held me in his arms.

I lowered my gaze, feeling the warm Fox’s body temperature. On the table was the glass of water that was handed to Cheon Sa-yeon before.

‘In order not to send me to America from the beginning… you were trying to persuade me.’

That was probably why he held my neck and pretended to intimidate me, as well as say the deal.

But why? He didn’t even bother trying to stop me when I infiltrated the club.

After thinking for a long time about the difference between then and now, I realized.

‘Is it because I was on drugs?’

There was no good reason other than that. The result of thinking with a headache was quite frustrating, so I let out a sigh.

“You foolish bastard…”

In the past, it was hard to accept every time Cheon Sa-yeon behaved like this, but now I seemed to understand a little bit. I remembered the last image of Cheon Sa-yeon, who left without looking back as if he had made a big mistake.

If Cheon Sa-yeon was still by my side… I wanted to ask him honestly.

Were you worried about me? Did you say that because you were worried about me going to America? Still… do you believe me a little?

‘Well, if I ask him, he’s not the type of person who will give me an easy answer.’

These were the questions that I couldn’t reach and bury in my mind. Still, there might come a day when I could take it out.

It was difficult now, but someday.