Marriage First, True Love Later Novel

Chapter 31: Simply Hold on to You

Translator: Vicky_ Editor: Vicky_

“How did you hurt yourself?” Su Yicheng asked with an impassive expression. His face no longer had its usual warmth. Instead, a sense of austerity took its place, and this frightened Anran somewhat.

Anran yanked her hand away, stood up, and looked at him as she replied somewhat sheepishly, “I accidentally bumped it.” She didn’t have the guts to tell him that she had been afraid that he would do something to her, so she pretended to be asleep, and that she received the bruises and welts on her hand when she’d bumped her hand against the nightstand in the process of feigning sleep to avoid him.

Su Yicheng stared at her and didn’t speak for a long time. Just when Anran was starting to feel a little uncomfortable with being stared at for so long and wanted to open her mouth to say something, he suddenly turned around and hopped off the bed. Anran was thus left sitting there alone and wondering what had just happened.

When Su Yicheng came back again, he had a tube of ointment in his hands, yet he still had the same blank expression on his face. He pulled over a chair from across the room and sat down on her side of the bed. He pulled her hand toward him, then gently applied the ointment to the bruises on the back of her hand.

Perhaps he didn’t control the amount of force he used well enough. Because even though Su Yicheng was already applying it very gently, Anran still felt a painful sensation, and her hand trembled involuntarily. “Chi—!” She clenched her jaw tightly.

Su Yicheng frowned and asked, “Am I hurting you?”

Anran shook her head vigorously, and her face flushed slightly.

Su Yicheng retracted his gaze and squeezed some more ointment onto his fingers. This time, his movements were even lighter, and his expression grew even more solemn.

As she gazed at the serious expression on his face, Anran suddenly felt her field of vision grow fuzzy, and the scene in front of her at the moment suddenly overlapped with a memory in her mind. She remembered that, six years ago, there had once been a boy who also applied ointment onto her in a similarly meticulous manner, but at that time, she hadn’t been clenching her teeth tightly to avoid crying out in pain as she did now. Instead, she had cried out to the boy coquettishly to tell him how painful and pitiful it was, and in return, she would receive sympathetic looks from the boy. Then, she would secretly call him a fool inside for being deceived so easily.

After Su Yicheng finished applying the ointment, he put the lid back on and placed it aside. Then, he turned back to see Anran staring at her own hands with a dumbfounded expression on her face and a distant look in her eyes as if she was in deep contemplation.

“Anran?” Su Yicheng whispered but saw that she still maintained the same posture and didn’t seem to hear him.

“Anran?” Su Yicheng looked at her and whispered again. This time, Anran heard him. She suddenly lifted her head and stared at him blankly with tears in her eyes.

......

“How is it going?” Su Yicheng was frightened by her expression. He felt that his movements had already been as light and gentle as possible. Did he hurt her again?

Anran came back to her senses and raised her hands to wipe her eyes. She shook her head. “It’s nothing, thank you.”

Su Yicheng guessed that she probably had something on her mind, and it was probably something that struck a deep chord within her. Yet he didn’t want to probe if she didn’t feel like bringing it up, because he knew very well that some wounds needed time in order to gradually heal.

He sat down properly, looked straight at her, and, after a long while, Su Yicheng finally spat out, “Anran, let’s talk.”

Anran looked at him and asked, “What do you want to talk about?”

“Anran, what I want to tell you is that I am also an average guy, and it is normal for me to have some impulses as well. Do you understand that?” Su Yicheng looked into her eyes and said.

Anran’s face turned bright red. Of course she understood what he meant by impulses, and she knew that, as his wife, she had obligations, and his requests weren’t unreasonable. Now that he had brought the issue out into the open, she no longer had any valid reason to refuse, but she really, really wasn’t ready yet!

As she thought of this, Anran’s body leaned back reflexively.

Su Yicheng stared at her tomato-red face and felt offended yet amused at the same time. How terrible his image must appear to her for him to inspire such tremendous fear and terror.

He sighed helplessly and suddenly felt that he had no idea how to continue this conversation. Despite the fact that dialogue was something he was frequently exposed to at work, at that moment, he found himself at a loss for words. Perhaps he really should reach out to his political commissar father and ask him to teach him some conversational skills.

He looked at her and finally shook his head in defeat. “Forget it, it’s nothing.” He got up to put the chair back in place, then went around to the other side of the bed and lifted the quilted covers to go to bed. Anran watched him as he did this and couldn’t help but feel a little guilty inside. She wanted to say something, but she didn’t know what to say. In the end, she decided to make a resolute decision to make up her mind. Next time… if he wanted it next time, then regardless of whether she was ready or not, she would not refuse or evade him.

“Sleep,” Su Yicheng said lightly, then he turned off the lamp and lay down. Anran nodded and laid down by his side.

In the darkness, the two of them slept on separate sides of the bed and left a large gap in the middle.

Anran grabbed the blanket and laid on the edge of the bed with her eyes wide open. She couldn’t fall asleep. Sleeping in the same bed as a stranger still made her nervous. Of course, the day before was an exception because she had fallen asleep and was, therefore, unaware.

As she heard the breathing of the man beside her on the other side of the bed gradually stabilize, the anxiety inside Anran gradually started to ease up as well. Then, along with increasing drowsiness, her eyes started to close, and her breathing started to grow slow and steady.

Yet, just when Anran was about to fall asleep, Su Yicheng suddenly turned around, gently placed his hands upon her waist, then wrapped his other hand around her neck and placed her head on his arms.

Due to this series of movements, Anran’s body tensed up reflexively, and all her previous drowsiness vanished in an instant. Her entire person was now wide awake, but she dared not make a peep, and her eyes remained closed. She was prepared to “sacrifice himself,” but then she felt his warm breath on her ears, and his mellow voice sounded in her ears.

“Anran, if you don’t want me to, I won’t force it. I just want to hold on to you as I sleep, so rest assured.”

In the darkness, Anran opened her eyes and was somewhat stupefied because his words moved her somewhat, yet they also made her feel all the more guilty. After a while, she simply said, “Sorry, I’m not ready yet.”

Su Yicheng nodded and hugged her body tighter. “I know, I know, don’t worry. I won’t force you. Just tell me when you’re ready; it’s all right.”

“Hmm…” Anran replied, and little by little, her body relaxed in his arms.

Su Yicheng held her in his arms and simply whispered, “Sleep now.”

Sleepiness soon overtook her, and it didn’t take long for Anran to fall asleep in his arms.