Chapter 236 Regret and Doubt
Chapter 236 Regret and Doubt
The Boldenville family kitchen comprised three distinct areas. The primary room served as the cooking space, while the left side housed an array of ingredients. On the right was a designated room where the maids would take their turns resting. In addition to their culinary duties, the maids would also spend time in the kitchen to consume leftovers. Moreover, they played a crucial role by delivering food to each soldier stationed in Boldenville at specified daily intervals.
Cases of food theft were rare because Lady Ayde always counted the income and expenses every week, so any suspicious movement would be easily founded, and if someone were caught stealing, Lord Reynold would cut off their hand and dismiss them from the house.
The kitchen suddenly became overcrowded, making it impractical for cooking. This was because of the presence of a peculiar individual who caught the attention of the maids, causing them to gather and observe him in the kitchen.
Since Reynold ordered Rachel to steal Allen's recipes and cooking methods, Allen's status as a guest had changed to Lord Reynold's personal cook and soldier for a while, so Allen spent most of his time in the Boldenville family kitchen.
Allen, unfamiliar with and not adept at teaching others to cook, told Rachel to watch and ask questions during the process. So while Allen cooked, Rachel stood beside him, watching his movements.
The unusual choice of spices, the way he smelled the ingredients, and then his skillful hands with the knife made the maids who entered the kitchen pause and watch him cook. Beyond their admiration for Allen's skill, there was another feeling in their hearts when they suddenly saw another side of Allen, who was used to looking like a troubled child, a cold-blooded scary killer, but now cooking like a professional.
(ILLUSTRATION)
"Everyone get out!" shouted Rachel as the situation started to get out of hand. "What are you all doing here? You still have other jobs, right?!"
"We're sorry!!!" they all shouted, exiting the kitchen and resuming their work.
"Are you okay?" asked Allen when he saw Rachel starting to look congested.
"It's fine; I should have been used to this, but lately, it's been getting tiring."
"No wonder, you've been taking care of Felicia's body since morning; during the day you have to help Lord Reynold's work; sometimes you're also asked to take care of the young master."
"Yes, I didn't expect that I would have to learn to cook now. I'm starting to feel the fatigue."
"Is there anything I can do for you?"
"Of course not, the only thing I want from you is to look after Lady Felicia."
"Felicia..."
Seeing Allen's face as he said it, Rachel finally asked, "Do you really not want to see her?" Rachel had never asked Allen why he didn't want to see her, and since more than seven days had passed, she thought she needed to give him some encouragement.
"If you still think about what happened that night, you don't need to worry. Lady Felicia won't hate you for leaving her. After all, you have saved her from the Dolls."
"It's not that," Allen replied briefly. After that, Allen stayed silent while stirring the soup in the pan, looking at the swirling soup while thinking in doubt. 'I can't pretend to be happy in front of her knowing that I was the one who killed the person she loved.'
Three years passed, and he never got used to facing people whose families he had killed.
"Allen, tonight, try to meet Lady Felicia."
"Maybe some other time."
"I insist. You can't go on like this. If you want to protect her, you have to get used to that guilt-NO-you should serve Lady Felicia with that guilt. It's something you need to endure for the Lady's sake."
"Umm, I'll think about it."
"I told you, I insisted. Why do you think I brought you here so soon? What if Lady Felicia wakes up when I'm not by her side? I don't want her to wake up alone. She might need a drink of water, or she might be hungry, or she might force herself to walk outside out of confusion.
I want you to accompany Lady Felicia in my absence, understand?"
"I-I-"
"You have to come tonight anyway; otherwise, I'll be very disappointed," Rachel came out of the kitchen while bamming the door.
"Hey! Don't you still want to learn to cook..." uselessly, Rachel had already gone far from the kitchen.
Outside, Rachel walked quickly, grumbling, "I know that he has changed, but if he doesn't want to meet Lady Felicia in the end, it's better for him to be his old self! The old him wouldn't have been so awkward and complied right away!"
...
In the kitchen, Allen remained quiet and composed as he readied himself for his upcoming encounter with Felicia later that evening. As he stirred his spoon absentmindedly, his mind wandered back to the moments he had shared with Felicia, particularly the time they had spent together inside the carriage on their way to Andoram family.
Allen never forget Felicia's expression at that time; even for his old self, who hated humans, he was mesmerized by the smile she showed at that time, which made him feel relaxed and unable to listen to her talk for ten minutes.
"Mr. Waldo is a wonderful person!"
"The night I met Mr. Waldo, I felt reborn. He was the reason I lived and the reason I became stronger, everything I did and I will do is for the sake of him."
Just then Allen asked, "You live for someone else?" and Felicia confidently replied
"That's right! I might live to make others happy. That's the path I want to take in life, and that's how I'll achieve my happiness. His happiness is my happiness too."
Allen snapped out of his reverie after smelling a rather strong odor from the soup he made.
"Woaaa!"
Allen immediately turned off the flame and noticed that the soup he was cooking was already quite dry.
"Huft, at this rate, I'll have to make it from scratch."
While cleaning up everything he had done, Allen remembered Felicia, which only made his doubts grow.
"There's no way I can see her face again."
There was no way he could see her, especially when he knew that he would be the cause of the disappearance of her smile.
Allen murmured "His Happiness is my happiness too."
If Felicia know he was the one who killed her fiancee, she probably would hate him, like how he hate Leofric.