Chapter 383 The Search Is Over (1)
"You must be thinking that I am so selfish for not even trying to give Feifei a chance to know her birth mother. Do you think Feifei would hate me if she knew that I hid the truth from her?" She chuckled, feeling foolish for wanting to keep Feifei to herself.
When Su Xiaofei was growing up, she slowly became a beautiful rose that had yet to bloom. Many of those who'd seen her daughter commented on how beautiful she looked and how her Feifei resembled Bai Qingyue, who had already reached the peak of her career at that time.
As Yun Qingrong stared at her young daughter, she could see why those people said those words. Indeed, looking closely, one might easily mistake her daughter as Bai Qingyue's child or a relative of hers.
The seed of doubt had ingrained itself in Yun Qingrong's heart and because of the constant comments she received from others, she decided to hire someone to investigate Bai Qingyue. There must be a logical reason why her daughter had an uncanny resemblance with the actress.
As a famous celebrity, Yun Qingrong wasn't surprised that Bai Qingyue was hiding a secret from the public regarding her personal life. However, she didn't expect to find out that her assumptions about the actress were spot on. Even more, the possibility of Qiao Fengying being Feifei's real father. She was afraid that if the two found out about her daughter's existence, she would lose Feifei for eternity.
Bai Qingyue had gotten pregnant at the time when her career had just taken a spike. Yun Qingrong wasn't surprised that Bai Qingyue had chosen her career over starting a family with her lover. After all, not many would have a chance to get popular overnight.
Still, she felt annoyed knowing the fact that Bai Qingyue had the heart to abandon Feifei in an orphanage that cannot even sustain the needs of the children that were left there. Even though it wasn't new to hear this in showbiz, the fact that Bai Qingyue abandoned Feifei at her very young age left a bitter taste in Yun Qingrong's mouth.
If she hadn't seen Feifei that fateful day, she couldn't imagine the kind of hardship her daughter would suffer growing up. She didn't think she would be able to live if she knew what could possibly happen to Feifei if she listened to her ex-husband.
Yun Qingrong still couldn't understand how a mother like Bai Qingyue could do such a thing to her own child. Perhaps she would never know, because she had neither carried nor given birth to a child. Because of this, she misplaced her resentment towards Bai Qingyue and decided to keep her young daughter to herself.
As for Qiao Fengying, she could feel regret and guilt towards him. She hadn't even surmised that the father and daughter's paths would collide, eventually meeting each other through Lu Qingfeng. Seeing them interact with each other, Yun Qingrong's heart breaks a little, knowing that she denied Feifei a chance to know her real father.
This was why when she found out that her daughter met and got acquainted with the Qiao family, she didn't dare to stop Feifei from meeting them. Yun Qingrong knew that she had purposely deceived her daughter due to her own selfishness.
"I'm not the perfect mother she assumed me to be."
She was ashamed of what she had done, but Yun Qingrong didn't think she regretted doing it. Even if she sought Bai Qingyue at that time, she was certain that the actress wouldn't treat her Feifei kindly and admit that she was her birth mother.
"Mother, I'm sure Feifei would try to understand if you come clean to her rather than finding out from another person." Lu Qingfeng said.
He was in no position to reveal Su Xiaofei's knowledge about her birth parents, but that didn't mean he would allow Yun Qingrong to be depressed over the matter. He understood why Yun Qingrong had kept in from Su Xiaofei, and he couldn't blame her for it.
"Just as you said, Mother. Each of us has a dark secret that we keep from everyone."
"I know what I've done is unforgivable, Xiao Feng. You don't have to try to convince that I'm not guilty of it." Yun Qingrong sighed dejectedly. "Even if I give Feifei everything that I have, it still wouldn't change the fact that I have robbed her of the opportunity to get to know and live with her real parents. It's no excuse for betraying Feifei's trust in me."
Lu Qingfeng fell silent, knowing that his mother-in-law had a valid point. Only Su Xiaofei could decide whether she would accept her mother's apology or not. He also didn't want to assume that it would be alright once his wife found out the truth.
Seeing his conflicted reaction, Yun Qingrong couldn't help but feel guilty. If Lu Qingfeng couldn't be certain of his wife's reaction, then it would also be impossible for Yun Qingrong to know how Feifei would take the truth.
"You don't have to overthink it. It is my sin and I should be the one responsible for it. No matter what, I hope that you won't forsake Feifei in the future."
"Mother speaks as if you wouldn't be here anymore." Lu Qingfeng frowned. He just gained a mother, and he wasn't willing to give her up just yet.
He somewhat understood why Feifei had been on edge recently. Both of them were given a chance to relive their lives, but they were both hopeless in changing Yun Qingrong's end. In his three lifetimes, it seemed that Su Xiaofei was bound to lose her mother one way or another.
"We both know the truth, Xiao Feng. There is no need to ignore the elephant in the room."
"Then what does Mother want to do now?"
"If you could please arrange a meeting with me and President Qiao. Keep it from Feifei for now."