Reject Humanity, Return to Monke

After our heart-to-heart, which inadvertently revealed my technical lie about my current status as a newborn, which I'll admit was unbelievable, even if you tried your best to believe, we both headed towards the place where our two teams were gathering after being tended to by the missing doctors and nurses in this Divine Realm.

Actually, scratch that, let's call them healers. Much more believable than a doctor, since this is a magic world…

"Soo… About that bit about your parents…" Catalina walked close to me, her arms not brushing against my fur, but close enough to emulate my senses to feel her. "Was everything about that true? I thought you were just a newborn?"

"… Well, technically yes, I am a newborn." I said, deciding in my mind to tell her at least some part of the truth. Since Catalina told me part of her story, I might as well do so too. "Ever heard of being reincarnated, or transmigrated?"

"Oh, you're one of those people?" Catalina's ears perked up when she heard the words that came out of her mouth, her eyes shining in… Is that pity…? "It's alright… I can understand how hard it is to adapt to this kind of world, especially if you're homeworld is completely different from ours."

"… Is it that common for reincarnees and transmigrators to appear?" I asked back, my hand scratching the back of my head due to how outlandish it sounded.

"Pretty much, yeah. In my entire life as a Dungeon Master, I count at least 20 reincarnees and transmigrators, and I'm just 38 years old." She said, exasperated by the fact.

"That common?" She nodded back, and this time, it was me who looked up at the ceiling with hazy eyes, my mind going in circles due to the revelation that was thrust upon me. "I… See…"

"Yep." She said, popping the P. "Gods in this world are very active, with some of them descending and doing some miracles or some other shit. Plus, throwing some people from different worlds and different planes of reality seems to be some kind of hobby for them. The reasons differed from one to another, but most of them said that they were, 'Hit by a truck,' whatever that meant."

"… So motherfucking Truck-kun is real?" I stared at the ceiling ever harder, my feet stopping from automatically taking me to our destination due to the very unbelievable fact that Truck-kun, the meme born of the internet, was indeed real. 'I wonder what fed-up otakus would do with that information…?'

"Uhh… Jion, you alright there?" Catalina waved her hand in front of my face, garnering my attention as I looked at the concerned catwoman.

"… Just fine…" I waved back, my mind finally calming down from the information dump this catwoman gave me. "Let's just… Go where we need to go… I want to go sleep…"

"… Sure, I also need to sleep after everything that happened." She said it tiredly. I nodded in sympathy, feeling what she was feeling very clearly.

It took us a few minutes before we finally arrived at our destination, a giant hall filled with dozens of Dungeon Masters that were chatting up a storm, with giant video screens hovering in the air, showcasing the various matches that were currently ongoing.

It wasn't long before we found our group chilling in their seats situated around a giant, round table.

"Glad you're awake." Oshurkova said with a hint of a relieved smile. "You're the last of us to arrive, and frankly, it was quite worrying."

Beside her, I could see Typhial grinding her teeth at the attention I was getting from her so-called 'Queen.'

"Oi, ya took quite a beatin' there, eh mate?" Arekhus, who was busy chugging down some good old-fashioned beer, said with a grin. "Last one ta wake 'n wawrryin' all these lovely ladies. Such a chahrmah."

"Eh, you win some, you lose some. How'd your match go beforehand, Arek?" I asked while I took a seat, Catalina seating beside me with her ears flat against her head due to the noise of the Dungeon Masters around us.

"A bloody stomp is wat 'appened, mate." Arekhus chugged another mug of beer that was magically refilled by no one in particular. "We couldn't even bung a dent on one of their own, 'n we know we ahren't fahkin' weak eithah."

"… Ah, good ol' RNG." I mused out loud, causing most of the Dungeon Masters to look at me confused. "Right, I sometimes forget you all aren't familiar with the terms I use. RNG is an acronym for Random Number Generator. Basically, it's how random an event would be. Sometimes, RNG will dictate you have a good match-up. Sometimes, it would dictate you would have an incredible advantage, and sometimes, RNG just wants you to kill yourself to save yourself the pain."

I laughed at the end of my sentence, causing some of the more humorous Dungeon Masters in our group to laugh. That included Oshurkova, Catalina, Arekhus, Reia, Pilips (even if his was more of a nervous chuckle than a laugh), and Tanjin. The rest just shrugged and continued to do what it was they were doing.

"Anyway, what are we still doing here?" I asked, and Oshurkova pointed at the screens, my eyes following the gesture.

"We're waiting until the champion is decided." Oshurkova put her hand back on the table, before she proceeded to drink some tea from her cup elegantly, causing Typhial beside her to swoon due to how fancy she was.

The Yandere is strong here, I can feel it in my bones…

"In these Dungeon Games, losing in the last event will not outright send you back into your Dungeon and back into the Mortal Realm. Instead, we will be healed, before being escorted to the main hall, where we are free to do anything, except fight, until the event is over."

"… By anything, you mean anything… Right…?" I asked. She sighed, some red dusting her cheeks as she directed my gaze towards a corner where Dungeon Masters were…

I quickly turned my head before slamming my face on the table. Good thing I was a gorilla, otherwise my face would be blushing madly by now.

"Why…" My voice came out muffled due to the fact that my face was smushed against the table. "Why are they all having sex in that place…? I even saw a penis go inside another Dungeon Master, who I was sure was male, even if he looked like a girl."

Looking up slightly, I saw Oshurkova's face blushing slightly, but otherwise, not that terribly bothered by the fact that there were some Yaoi, Yuri, Straight, Gangbangs, BDSM, Reverse Gangbang, and others happening in that corner of the hall over there.

Hell, there were even Furries, Necrophilia, and Beastiality, due to how Dungeon Masters are mostly monsters in appearance. I could even see a skeleton getting it on with a woman who was completely wrapped in toilet paper.

"Just ignore them… God Chythos doesn't even bat an eye at them, saying that the other Gods are worse, and who are we to stop them from having fun?" Oshurkova groaned out loud while sipping her tea, trying to forget the debauchery that was ongoing in that little corner of the hall. I could even see some of the Dungeon Masters who were previously chatting joining in that little corner of sex.

I smashed my face back down on the table, eliciting some laughs from Arekhus, Tanjin, and quite surprisingly, both Reia and Keia.

"… Please don't tell me what I think it is…" I groaned out the moment my thoughts led to a very possible scenario, where these four Dungeon Masters participated in that corner of debauchery before.

"It's true-la. We've been in that corner before-la." And there it is. Reia's confirmation just made me wasn't to forget everything and sleep. I may want to have some sex, but exhibitionism is just not for me…

"Arekhus over here was the best for wrecking some males' behinds-ta. Their words, not mine-ta." Keia said, which made me want to hide under the table and knock myself to sleep to get out the images now starting to form inside my head.

Once again, I am not opposed to being gay. Just, being a straight male, images of BL make me cringe in disgust. I want sexy women! Not buff males going on with each other!

Traps, however, are negotiable… Oh no… Am I becoming gay…?

After pounding my head on the table for a few minutes, the other members of our team laughing all the while, we heard some trumpets sounding out.

"Well, it looks like the champion has been decided." Oshurkova said while standing up. The rest of us followed suit and looked at the figure sitting upon the throne of gold and metals not commonly found in the Mortal Realm.

"Finally, I can go sleep and wash my brain with bleach." I said off-handedly, causing Pilips to laugh quietly, while the others were confused at the term bleach. I looked at Pilips, who was still laughing softly, but not noticing my gaze. '… Is he…? Maybe… Catalina did say there were a bunch of transmigrators and reincarnators in this world… Maybe he's one of them? Not my place to pry, though.'

I looked away and focused back on the God of Monsters sitting regally at the throne while holding a goblet of jewels in his right hand.

"Dungeon Masters, today, this Decennial Dungeon Games, has come to an end, and I am proud to present to you, the champions." Chythos stood up from his throne and gestured his arms to the side, a giant rift appearing in the air. Stepping out of the rift, I saw five Dungeon Masters, all of them looking like they were something out of a book full of dangerous and deadly creatures, and the worst part?

All of them were armed to the teeth, as well as sentient…

"May I present to you these five, who have overcome the odds and risen to the top."