Run, Girl (If You Can)

Chapter 225: Could This Be Fixed?

Keeley was surprisingly comfortable snuggled up with Aaron so she ended up falling asleep too. When she woke up it was about three in the morning and she was completely trapped. She had rolled over in the night so she was facing him and was pressed up against his chest with his arm slung over her and their legs tangled together.

She sighed. She was wide awake now. Her heart was racing uncomfortably from the closeness. They hadn't slept like this in a long, long time.

Even when they were married, this kind of simple intimacy stopped once she lost the baby. They had only been married for two years at that point. Their marriage died so early on and yet it didn't end for another six and a half years.

It was still hard to believe Aaron only sent her away because he wanted her to be safe. How long had it taken him to come to that conclusion? Her father had been killed two years earlier and he said he was trying to gather the information to prove it wasn't an accident…

Had he let her go because he couldn't prove it or because his enemies were making further moves against him? Did he never consider adoption because he didn't want to put another innocent child in danger?

So many assumptions Keeley had made back then were wrong. That didn't change after she found out the truth. She was so angry about his selfishness that she didn't think about the reasons behind it.

Seeing how desperate he was for her company now…it must have been really hard for him to push her away. It was still an incredibly stupid thing to do but she tried to think about it from a different perspective.

Aaron was a month away from his 22nd birthday when they got married. He always seemed too grown up because of the way he was raised but that didn't change the fact that he was young. He naively thought that he could handle whatever problems were thrown at them as long as they got to stay together.

She gazed at his peaceful sleeping face. He was about this age when the whole 'ectopic pregnancy' thing happened. Twenty-four. How could a twenty-four year old have been expected to handle something like that?

He made the wrong call but he did the only thing he could think of at the time. Keeley had been blaming him too much. If she was in his shoes back then…would she have had the courage to tell him the truth either? She wasn't sure.

Two kids in love. If the world were a simpler place, that's all the two of them would have been.

It was impossible to go back to that level of sweet innocence but…could this be fixed? Aaron still loved her. Her heart had been hardened so much by what she had been through that she didn't feel the same.

Her heart didn't race just from looking at him. Being around him didn't make her happy the way it did once upon a time. At best, she felt sorry for him.

She wanted Aaron to find his own happiness but he insisted that he could only be happy with her. He was very good to her but appreciating that wasn't the same as being in love with him.

Keeley had a very clear picture of what being in love with him was like since it had happened before. Whatever she felt now wasn't the same thing.

Moving in here had been a mistake but it wasn't like she had anywhere else to go until she had a real job after graduation. This would only hurt them both in the end.

He had seemed so happy this past week. Even now he had a soft, content expression on his face as he slept. What was going to happen to him when she inevitably left?

She leaned her forehead against his. 'I'm sorry I can't give you what you want, Aaron,' she thought.

Staying here really wasn't fair to him but she also knew he would put up a fuss if she tried to leave. He didn't seem to care what was fair or not; he just wanted her around. It made her feel worse.

Keeley lay trapped there, stewing in her thoughts for about another hour before Aaron rolled over enough that she was able to free herself without waking him. There was no way she would be able to go back to sleep now.

She resigned herself to taking a nice long bubble bath before getting ready for the day and heading over to her dad early. Unfortunately, she nearly tripped over a cat on her way to the bathroom—she couldn't tell which one in the dark—and that scared her so much that she was even more keyed up than before.

She flipped on the bathroom lights and used that to guide her way as she snuck back to her room for a towel and some clothes in the semi-darkness. The last thing she wanted to do was wake Aaron up. He needed his sleep.

The sound of the bath running was soothing and Keeley felt all of her thoughts flow away with the water. Nothing mattered right now. Not the death anniversary, not her uncertain future after graduation, and not her situation with Aaron. Nothing at all.

Easing herself into the warm water, she closed her eyes and leaned her head back against the seat. She had used an appropriate amount of bubble bath this time so they didn't pile up high above her head.

The jets were so relaxing that she didn't come out until the water had gone cold. She put on a blue tee shirt with a giant yellow smiley face on it and some jean shorts before wrapping her hair in its usual towel turban.

It was only 5:03 AM. She should make some muffins or something while she waited for her hair to dry. She was pretty sure there were blueberries in the fridge. Her dad loved blueberry muffins; hopefully they could help cheer him up a little.