The Tales of an Infinite Regressor

[Translator - Jjescus]

[Proofreader - Gun]

Chapter 150

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Strategist II

2

[Let's take the quickest route first.]

The saintess's 'broadcast' voice echoed.

For reference, the saintess wasn't in Seoul but was hiding nearby. Right after forming an alliance with her, I carried her on my back and brought her along.

[The most efficient route is to go from Busan to Jeju Island, and then from Jeju Island to Japan.]

The saintess was hiding from the views of Oh Dokseo, and read the script exactly as I dictated.

I kept moving my lips discreetly so Oh Dokseo wouldn’t notice.

At this point, the saintess used [Time Stop] to decipher my lip movements painstakingly.

Script: Doctor Jang. Voice: The Saintess.

In a way, this was a bit more of a classic broadcast than an internet stream. It was more akin to how producers and writers create programs based on a pre-written script.

Through the saintess's voice, and through my script, we directed Oh Dokseo.

[The first hurdle here is securing a ferry from Busan to Jeju Island. This is the main problem.]

[At this point, the Anomalies of the Censorship Bureau haven't yet been generated, and even if they were, Jeju Island is part of Korea, so we can't use it.]

[If your aura was sufficiently advanced, you could demonstrate the level-crossing technique, but it’s still very early in the game. It’s too difficult to demand such a high-level skill from a character.]

[To level up that much, you'd have to spend over 10 years just on the Korean Peninsula.]

[But don’t worry.]

[In a speedrun, worrying about a safe ferry is a luxury. A reversal of thought: instead of taking the ferry, just 'drift' to Jeju Island. Simple, right?]

"What?"

Oh Dokseo was startled.

But the character played by Oh Dokseo had no free will.

[Now, if you follow this path, you'll find a library in Yeongdo. It's partially destroyed, but the Yeongdo Library is still standing.]

[If you go to the location I direct you to, you'll find a book called The Journal of Hamel's Drift.]

[Put that book in your backpack and then jump into the sea.]

“What?”

Oh Dokseo looked around.

But they wouldn’t have been able to find me. I was hiding in the shadows of the ruins, quite far away, watching Oh Dokseo.

The saintess (me) murmured quietly.

[Jump. Into the sea.]

“…….”

[There's a life jacket and a wooden board nearby. Equip them and jump.]

“…Aaaah!”

Splash.

The sea off Busan swallowed up the so-called book-possessed person.

“Haaah! Cold, cold! So freaking cold!”

[The character is whining about something. Let’s just lightly ignore it.]

[Some viewers might already know, but Hamel was originally Dutch and was trying to go to Japan before his ship was wrecked.]

[And he drifted to Jeju Island following the ocean currents. Since our final destination is also Japan, in many ways, we're similar to Hamel.]

"Hieeek! It's shaking! It's shaking! Aah! Water! Water’s coming in!"

[There’s a reason why I chose the 'book-possessor' Oh Dokseo for this playthrough. Oh Dokseo has red hair.]

[In the past, Koreans referred to Westerners as 'Hongmo-gui' (Red-Haired Devils). It meant their hair and beards were bright red.]

“Aah-! Aah! Pa, ha! Save me! I'm gonna die! Sir! Hieek! I’m really going to die!”

[Don't worry.]

[Oh Dokseo’s personal color was practically made to be a Hongmo-gui.]

[And since you've even packed The Journal of Hamel's Drift in your backpack, the energy of the entire ocean will help guide you to Jeju Island.]

[Based on the countless playthroughs I've tested, the chances of Oh Dokseo safely drifting to Jeju Island in the very early stages are a whopping 81%.]

“What? Wait a minute! Then what about the other 19%―― Huaaak! The waves! The waves! Hyaaah?”

Oh Dokseo screamed.

I leisurely walked on the water, following Oh Dokseo from a distance. I was ready to save them if things went south, but with that much fear, tsk, tsk.

After a while, Oh Dokseo was washed ashore and collapsed onto the beach.

Jeju Island, landing successful.

“Ugh, urgh……. Hieek…….”

[Ah. As expected. It only took 31 minutes and 14 seconds to reach Jeju Island.]

[In this game, the sea is far more dangerous than land. There are even deep-sea Anomalies that haven't been properly conquered which is why I created this strategy.]

[But as you can see, even a beginner who has just cleared the tutorial can easily cross the sea if they utilize their character's traits and items. Quite simple, right?]

"Simple, my ass, ugh, uweeek!"

[We don't have time to waste. Let's take a brief rest and then move immediately.]

“Hng, I don’t want to do this anymore……”

While Oh Dokseo suffered from seasickness, I quickly ran to Seongsan Ilchulbong and picked up the 'Monkey's Paw.'

A dangerous object that once made Kuro sick and even put me, Doctor Jang, in a precarious situation.

To be precise, it threatened my hair roots.

When I realized that even Sim Aryeon's healing abilities couldn't cure baldness, my head spun.

Though it was a troublesome anomaly in many ways, the 'Total Luck Theory' in this excluded expedition was the key item to clear the challenge.

It was something I had to secure here.

[Did you know?]

[After arriving in Jeju Island and being captured by Joseon, Hamel finally succeeded in escaping after 13 years.]

[The place he fled to after escaping Joseon was none other than Japan, just like our destination.]

[So originally, you would have to wait a whopping 13 years for the cooldown of Hamel's Drift to reset…]

[But as you all know, the game 'Log Out' is a buggy mess. Naturally, there are exploits.]

Thunk.

I secretly handed a piece of charcoal to Oh Dokseo. Oh Dokseo, still suffering from seasickness, was too distracted to notice.

"Huh...? A pencil lead? What am I supposed to do with this?"

[In the past, prisoners would mark the days on the walls to count how long they had been imprisoned.]

[Right now, Oh Dokseo is occupying the position of 'A person detained in Joseon.' Therefore, let's enter a room surrounded by walls on all sides.]

Oh Dokseo entered a ruined house. This house was also a place I had scouted beforehand.

She descended into the basement without windows, locked the basement door, and began writing on the wall with the charcoal.

正正正正正正正正正正

正正正正正正正正正正

正正正正正正正正正正

正正正正正正正正正正

正正正正正正正正正正

The saintess's voice flowed.

[The period Hamel was detained was about 13 years. There's no need to account for leap years here.]

[365 days times 13. 4,745. Now, divide this by 5, and you get 949.]

[In this enclosed 'prison' space, if you write the character '正' (which means 'correct') 949 times—]

Before long, the charcoal snapped. Oh Dokseo had finished drawing the lines on the wall. Her fingers, which had been gripping the charcoal, were now blackened with dirt.

"I-I did it…."

[Very good. Now, Hamel's Drift will recognize that Oh Dokseo has spent 13 years in captivity.]

"Wow… How did you even figure out this exploit?"

[It's an exploit that only works for traveling to Jeju or Japan. If your aura is strong enough, there's no need to use it.]

[But right now, this is the fastest method.]

As we left the house, a small boat, which hadn't been there before, lay tired on the beach.

"Eek. I don't know how to row, is that okay?"

[It's fine. No matter what, this boat will safely reach Japan.]

"This is so… unsettling…."

Oh Dokseo boarded the boat and safely landed in Japan.

Of course, 'safely' here means she arrived with all his limbs intact.

"Ugh… I'm never… I really never want to get on a boat again…."

[Arrival in Japan in 59 minutes.]

"Never… again…."

[Now, let's farm the 'Hate Pill.']

The saintess lightly dismissed Oh Dokseo's despair.

For the record, only Oh Dokseo was unaware, but the saintess had comfortably crossed the strait on my back.

The saintess's [Clairvoyance] had a range limit of 1,000 kilometers. To provide Oh Dokseo with stable navigation guidance, the saintess also had to move a certain distance.

['Hate Pill' can be found throughout the Japanese archipelago.]

[The closest area is Sasebo City in Nagasaki Prefecture.]

[Here, on the coast of this city, there is a naval port. Not a human naval port, but an anomaly's naval port—this entire area is void.]

[However, following my guidance, you can safely reach the headquarters. Trust me.]

Along the way, anomalies that tried to discover and eliminate Oh Dokseo appeared, but I quietly dealt with those minor nuisances.

Oh Dokseo safely reached the command room.

And the moment she opened the door.

"Hick!"

Oh Dokseo gasped at the scene inside the room.

"W-What is this…?"

The saintess and I both spoke calmly.

[This is the fate of protagonists in dark-themed stories who have ended their lives.]

[Translator - Jjescus]

[Proofreader - Gun]

Inside the command room, dozens or even hundreds of dolls hung from the ceiling, with nooses around their necks.

Some were dressed as white-coated admirals, others in medieval knight armor, and still others in the suits of entertainment industry professionals.

They were anomalies of the beings who were once called 'Commanders,' 'Knights,' 'Producers,' 'Commanders,' 'CEOs,' 'Teachers,' 'Trainers,' and so on in various games.

This was a place I had learned about back in the 590th turn through the Magical Girl Association.

Dangling—

The doll-like anomalies swayed right in front of Oh Dokseo's face.

"Heeek!"

[All of them took the 'Hate Pill,' and unable to endure the hatred of those around them, they died.]

"Scary… This place is so scary…!"

[Ah, but don't worry, they're not real humans. They are nothing more than manifestations of anomalies derived from fictional works and parodies.]

[Since they are already considered dead, they can't really affect living humans. Now, let's approach the nearest doll and open its mouth.]

"Its… mouth? You want me to open that thing's mouth?"

[Go on.]

"Ugh…"

Oh Dokseo, on the verge of tears, opened the doll's mouth. While hidden in the shadows, I also opened another doll's mouth.

Inside the mannequin's mouth. On its tongue lay a bright red pill.

The inside of the mannequin's mouth. A bright red pill rested on its tongue.

It was the "Hate Pill."

I farmed two of those pills. I held one in my hand and handed the other to the saintess.

[Now, let's take the pills.]

Gulp.

Oh Dokseo, the saintess, and I—three of us—swallowed the "Hate Pill" at the exact same moment.

Without delay, I pulled out the monkey’s paw from my pocket. I had brought this eerie item from Jeju Island just for this moment.

I whispered softly to the hairy hand.

“Monkey’s paw, monkey’s paw. Grant me my wish.”

-……

The monkey’s paw trembled.

The wish I whispered was this:

――――――――――

1. Oh Dokseo, the saintess, and I (hereafter referred to as "we") will be plagued by all kinds of "misfortune." Specifically, everyone we meet will come to hate us.

2. The misfortune that befalls us will be confined as much as possible to us alone. In other words, others around us will not get caught up in it.

3. The reaction to our "misfortune"—that is, "fortune"—will only manifest when we desire it.

――――――――――

Twitch!

The monkey’s paw twisted.

-U, kki-gik, gik.

The monkey’s paw’s response was eerie. Its hair stood on end, as if it couldn't believe a mere human would make such a wish.

Indeed.

This was the "proper utilization of the luck quota system" I had arrived at after various experiments.

It may sound paradoxical, but you shouldn't wish for good fortune from the monkey's paw, like winning the lottery.

Quite the opposite, in fact.

-From now on, let all the lottery tickets I purchase be losers.

Misfortune.

One by one, I collect and accumulate misfortunes that I can bear, misfortunes that are almost to be expected.

What happens then?

The more misfortunes you endure, the more the "luck quota system" will have to work to bring you an equivalent amount of good luck.

And someday, at a truly critical moment, all your accumulated misfortune will be reversed into luck.

If the monkey’s paw were to exert all its effort to bring misfortune to the wisher――.

Then, right from the start, you could use that very backlash, ensuring that it would eventually have no choice but to bring you good luck.

-Ukke-kki-gik, gik, hik, kkigik.

Twitch, twitch, twitch!

The monkey’s paw convulsed as if trying to resist my wish, but it was futile.

The eerie item could not deny its own nature. So, it had no choice but to submit to a madman who wished for "misfortune" rather than "luck."

For a being that had lost its essence, only the annihilation of its existence remained.

-Kkigikikik…….

Ssshh.

In the end, the monkey’s paw vanished into thin air.

My wish had been granted.

And at that very moment.

[…Ah.]

The saintess let out a small gasp. It was a sound that only I could hear, not Oh Dokseo—a one-on-one conversation.

[Indeed……. To think you could manipulate human emotions like this.]

“How does it feel, my lady? Are you starting to find me repulsive?”

[…Yes. It might have been difficult to bear if I hadn't been forewarned.]

The saintess steadied her breath.

The saintess’s affection for me wasn’t particularly high at this early point in the journey.

Naturally, even if the "Hate Pill" reversed her affection, the impact wouldn't be significant. As someone with strong mental fortitude, the saintess could endure it.

But what about others?

From now on, everyone we meet will inexplicably feel a growing dislike toward us.

That dislike will continue to grow. They will subtly obstruct our path, try to undermine us, and constantly belittle our achievements.

Happy days will not be in our future.

As time goes on, misfortunes will inevitably accumulate for Oh Dokseo and me.

[…Now then, by taking the Hate Pill, the difficulty of this game has just skyrocketed.]

[But by raising the difficulty ourselves, we’ve secured an absolute moment of fortune. And we get to decide when that fortune will strike.]

Yes.

From this moment on, Oh Dokseo, the saintess, and I—the game's characters, players, and streamers—will move as one, with three personas but a single mind.

We will endure the misfortunes together.

We will store the weight of the misfortunes.

And when the most decisive moment arrives, when that despicable [Game Master of the All-Seeing Game] shows up――.

[At that moment, we will convert all our misfortune into fortune.]

“……”

Oh Dokseo swallowed hard.

The saintess and I exchanged a silent glance in the darkness beyond her sight.

[This is the strategy to kill a god.]

[Translator - Jjescus]

[Proofreader - Gun]