This Hero is Sleeping!



"O Vampire! Vampire!"

Elric screamed as he pulled up the lids of the trash chutes.

"Wherefore art thou, vampire?"

He screamed into the sewers.

"Deny thy hunger, and cast thy species!"

He called to the skies.

"''Tis but thy species that is my enemy!"

"Please, vampire. I can't listen to this bitch anymore. Please show up!" Erika poured water down on all of Elric's dreams and hopes, sending him reeling in fear and tears.

They had searched up in the skies and down in the sewers, out in the alleys and in on the buildings. But they only found zombies, and more zombies, and them some more zombies.

Of course, there were a bunch of people as well, so they picked them like pebbles off the street, and just like pebbles, they became too burdensome to carry along, so they ditched them back at the hotel over and over again, making it evening sooner than they had hoped.

"Why!? Why are there only zombies! It's almost like this is a zombie apocalypse or something."

"It is," Claude sighed and shook his head, their last target back near the warehouses. 

If that was truly the case then they sure had speedran through the apocalypse since the zombies barely scared them anymore. They were numerous yet, so not avoiding them wasn't an option.

This annoyed the others even more as with each of Elric's screams, more zombies would come running over as if they were his dogs and his voice their toys. 

Stretching his hand above his head while casually strutting through the streets, Elric being the only one that casual, he yawned and muttered.

"You know, if everywhere we look we only find the zombies, won't it be better to remove them all in a go?"

"How so?" Erika asked as she kicked down a door at the back of the warehouses. Inside the dark wideness, seats moved up like rows in a theater while a large stage with yet more steps stood at the other corner.

Luxury oozed out of this place, a place where one would expect it the least. 

Golden chandeliers hung from the top and spotlights brightened up the sets of instruments at the edge.

"What in the world is this?" she said, her voice strangely loud yet without echo.

"Eek!" A yelp sounded from the other end of the hall at her words. The group's eyes widened again and they rushed over to the stage. Beyond the small climb, a whole troupe of men and women, young and old, in suits of black and red sat under the seats on the stage, all of them huddled together and quaked in their boots as the voices of the group neared.

"Hello," Erika spoke, but her voice only scared them away.

"Tch. Elric."

The young boy grinned, he passed by Erika, but not before flicking her forehead. "Let masters handle this."

He leaned down the chairs, and after making a particularly soft face, spoke out loud.

"Hey, are you guys alright?"

Like the chimes of the finest lyres and the strums of the grandest harps, his voice reminiscent of that of an angel's made all of them look up, and then when they saw his face, all of them blushed. Such was the power of charm above the hundreds.

"I can never get used to this."

"Cocky brat."

The others with Elric could only sigh, imagining the disillusionment one would feel if they knew what he was truly like. No, they didn't even need to imagine.

"I have already felt it before."

"There, there, Quinton. You avoided a bullet I say."

He had.

"U-um… are you guys the knights? Adventurers?" the man at the front of the huddlers spoke. "T-there are strange monsters outside and—"

"We're the bringers of justice. I am the Ruler of Water and behind me are my cronies."

"Excuse me?"

Of course, he pulled this every time too.

"It's the truth. Now, were any of you, perchance, bitten or grazed by those monsters?"

The man shook his head, Elric's beauty and voice pulling every of his flaws under the rug where they hid too.

"Great, now, can you tell me who you all are, and what this place is?"

"Hm? Why's he asking that?" Puzo pondered, but didn't get an answer.

"T-that… we're an orchestra preparing for tomorrow's show, this place is a broken hall where we come to practice."

Bright smiles spread on Elric's face, he barely pinched his thighs and kept it together.

"Alright, why is this place broken?"

"Um, uh… It should dampen the voice with the spell but only amplifies it. We practice here before the major event to give some pleasant sounds to the people too! But! Now the entire city is filled with monster—"

"Alright, alright, shut up. How good are you? Can you play something impromptu?"

"Oh no…" Claude muttered, but was ignored promptly.

"P-probably? Can you please hel—"

"Bla, bla shut it!"

Elric mercilessly turned back to his group, smiling brighter than ever. He truly looked like the most beautiful of the gods' angels as he smiled. They all knew even Satan would cower from his smiles though.

"Remember how I said we can make the zombies come over instead?"

The group nodded.

"They are attracted to noise. We'll make a lot of noise and bring them all over. We have all the tools, this would also help us stop others from being harmed by the zombies when we gather them, this place also makes the sounds louder than they should be."

"Fuck, now that you say it…"

Elric was gaining some ideas about how things were moving, but didn't say anything for now.

He was being handed lemonade straight up. Instead of inspecting it for rat poison, he was going to savor every sip.

"No choice, huh?"

"Fine, let's do it."

Elric smiled and turned back to the instrumentalists. "All of you, crawl out."

"We're going to play something with a lot of duddududu and bang bang bang, sombre yet classical, fast yet elegant. My theme song… is a little bad to premiere here."

Elric crossed his arms and thought.

"Alright, let's call it, Chocolate Drive."