Why Did I Become the Villainess?

 I look outside my window and sigh. It's already midnight, but I still couldn't sleep. What happened this afternoon still lingers in my mind. 

 Rufus went through a lot because of the origin of his mother, the Duchess. Aside from it, he also has weird eyes and hair that make everyone scared of him. If not scared, they would see Rufus as a cursed child.

 I couldn't imagine how much in pain and traumatized the young Rufus was. And everything that happens to him is because of me. Then what? He will end up falling in love with Princess Paislee that will end up together with Prince Fraser? 

 Really, Ysa? Why do you need to make his life this miserable? What did Rufus do to you to make you do that to him? 

 I sigh again and lean my head on the window. I felt guilty because of what Rufus had been through. How painful must it be to bear all of the insults on his own? I don't even want to think.

 I am still blaming myself for what happened to Rufus when someone knocks on my door again. 

 I look at the wall clock, and I frown. It's already past midnight. Who is still awake by this time? But the most important thing is who is in front of my door? 

 Prince Fraser?

 I slowly walk towards the door and lean my ears on the door to hear what is happening outside. But I didn't hear anyone. 

 Am I hallucinating?

 I almost jump in shock when someone knocks on the door again. I put my hand on my chest. "Damn, I thought I'll have a heart attack because of that." I glare at the closed door. "Who is knocking on my door in the middle of the knight? That's definitely not from the Strzalka because I'm sure they won't knock on my door. 

 I sighed and decided to just wait for the person behind the door to leave. It's already midnight. I'll just tell whoever the person outside that I was already sleeping the time they are knocking.

 However, even after knocking for a couple of minutes now, the person still continues to knock. I sigh. This person is really persistent. What do they want?

 I have no other choice but to open the door. Maybe what the person will say is something important. I try my best not to frown when I see who is knocking at my door in the middle of the night.

 "Lady Csille, I hope I'm not interrupting your sleep." Princess Paislee looks at my back. It's as if she is waiting for someone to pop out behind my back. 

 I fake my shock. "Sir Farren? What are you doing here? In the middle of the night?" I poke my head out of the door and look at each side of the hallways. 

 "You can be assured that no one is around Lady Csille. I already check before I knock on your door." Princess Paislee said in a reassuring voice.

 I sigh. I'm worried that people will see Sir Farren knocks on my door in the middle of the night. I'm sure if people know about this, they will make this an issue.

 I look at Princess Paislee and wait for her to say what does she wants from me. She even risks talking to me in the middle of the night. I'm sure this is something important.

 Princess Paislee looks at my back. Is he checking if someone is inside my room? I look back at my room and frown. 

 "Lady Csille, I'm sorry for disturbing you in the middle of the night, but I just want to talk to you. Is it okay if you spare me some time? I promise you. This won't last long. Just a couple of minutes." Princess Paislee persuades me. I can definitely hear a hint of desperation in her voice. 

 Desperation? But why is she desperate?

 I nod my head at her. "Okay, what do you want to talk about, Sir Farren?"

 Princess Paislee looks around first before she looks at me helplessly. "Lady Csille, can we talk about this inside?" She asks in a small voice.

 What do we need to talk about that made her look like this? Her face is now all red. 

 I sigh and open my door for her. I'm not worried since the two of us are both women, and as Princess Paislee said, she made sure no one is around. I am more curious why would Princess Paislee knocks on my door in the middle of the night. What so urgent that she couldn't wait for it to reach morning?

 I gestured my hand to the empty chair. "You should sit first, Sir Farren." I sit on the bed while Princess Paislee is sitting on the chair. However, her sitting position is rather awkward. She is only sitting on the edge of the chair. 

 What is happening? Should I be worried now? 

 Princess Paislee bows her head. Is she shy? But why would she be shy about it? Princess Paislee then starts to play her own fingers. After a few minutes of silence, she raised her head. 

 I didn't talk because I was only waiting for her to talk about what's the reason why she is here inside of my room. Does something happen that I didn't know?

 "Lady Csille, do you have rag?"

 I frown. What did she ask? Rag? What rag is she talking about? "Pardon me, Sir Farren. However, can you repeat what you have said? I think I didn't hear it right. 

 Princess Paislee shakes her head. "You heard it right, Lady Csille. I am really looking for a rag. The one that ladies used when they are in their menstrual cycle."

 She is really looking for rags. I frown. "Rags? Why would you need rags?" I look at her from head to toe. 

 Princess Paislee's face becomes redder. "Please, don't misunderstand me, Lady Csille. It might be embarrassing to admit this, but I have been having trouble controlling my own liquids. I consulted a doctor, and he said I have problems with my bladder which resulted in me having urinary incontinence. I couldn't control my urine, and the doctor recommended me to use rags. I bought rags secretly, but since I get too embarrassed with it. Instead of washing it, I burn it. I only realized that I didn't have any rags left. Don't worry, Lady Csille. I will buy you tomorrow. Just let me borrow one for tonight." Princess Paislee said in desperation.

 I sigh. I thought she would talk about Prince Fraser about. It's a good thing. It's just about rags. 

 Since the setting of my novel is medieval so this world doesn't have any tampons or pads for women to use. They only use rags if they have periods. 

 If Princess Paislee is not in front of me, I would have laughed at her. She even carefully made an alibi that she had urinary incontinence so that I could give her rags. She is truly the Crown Princess of the Aeslaerean Kingdom. Wise.

 I smile at her and nods my head. "I have rags here." I stand up and look for the brand new rags I just bought, and I bring them to her. "Here, you don't need to return it to me or to exchange it with rags. I have many spares in here. You don't have to worry." I paused and pretended to think. "What did the Doctor said? How long will your urinary infection would last?"

 Princess Paislee takes the rags from my hands with her trembling hands, and with a shy voice, she answered me, "The doctor assured me that it's something not big and will only last for three to seven days." Princess Paislee looks at the rags again before she looks back at me. "Thank you for this rag Lady Csille. You don't know how much you save me. I thought I would sleep like this the whole night."

 She really thinks it through. Doesn't she? Three to seven days? That's the same length of menstruation. If I didn't know her true identity, I would have fallen into her alibi. I want to clap my hands at Princess Paislee. She really knows how to lie without battling an eyelid. 

 I smile at her. "If you need another spare, just come to me, and I will give you."

 Princess Paislee shakes her head and waves her hand as a sign of total refusal. "Lady Csille, your help this once is already enough for me. I wouldn't dare to bother you again."

 I shake my head at Princess Paislee. "You are not a bother Sir Farren. You are his highness, Prince Fraser's royal knight. How can you do your duty if you're not comfortable, right? So, don't be shy. Didn't we already agree that we are a team? So, don't be shy to come up to me if you need another rag."

 Princess Paislee's face reddens even more. She then stands up from her seat. "I'll be taking my leave now, Lady Csille. I already bother you too much. Thank you for giving me these rags. I promise you I'll exchange it for something new."

 I stand up too and just shake my head at her. "It's just a rag. You don't need to worry about that as long as I can help you. Then I am okay."

 Princess Paislee looks at me with a frown on her face. What did I say something wrong? I tried recalling my words, and I almost want to slap my mouth. Princess Paislee doesn't know. I know she's disguising herself as a man. Does she think I'm into her? I want to knock my head on the wall. How can I not choose my words correctly? 

 I smile awkwardly at her. Now, how can I explain things to her? I sigh. "What I mean is, I'm glad to help you because you're the knight of Prince Fraser, right? And Prince Fraser is my fiancée, so I'll do anything to make Prince Fraser safe. That also includes helping you so you could do better at your duty."

 Princess Paislee stares at me for a couple of minutes before she nods her head. I sigh in relief. I thought she would know I know something. I cannot make Princess Paislee knows about the future and that I am not the real Csille. Well, technically, I am. 

 I walk her towards the door. Princess Paislee hides the rags inside her clothes. She then bows at me. "Thank you again for giving me this. You don't know how much a lifesaver you are, Lady Csille."

 I just smile at him. At least by this, I could repay you for what I will be doing in the future. 

 Princess Paislee turns her back at me, and she is about to take a step when she suddenly looks back. "Lady Csille, can you do me another favor?"

 I force myself not to frown and just smile at her. "What favor?" Don't tell me it's about Prince Fraser again? When will my female lead will realize that she is matchmaking her own Prince Charming to someone else? 

 Princess Paislee looks around first before she looks at me. "What happened tonight. Can you please keep it a secret? I don't want people to know about my problem, and it will be troublesome if people find out that I visited you in the middle of the night. So, I hope you can forget all of this happened." Princess Paislee sounds so desperate. If she can use the Illorian Pill for me to forget all that happened, she probably made me ingest it. 

 I smile at her. "You don't need to worry about that, Sir Farren. I didn't meet you. I didn't see you, and I didn't talk to you tonight. We didn't talk, remember?"

 Princess Paislee smiles gratefully at me before she leaves. 

 I sigh and lean on the wall while looking at her walking away from me. No one should know her disguised. If anyone else, I am not the person she needs to worry about. I mean, at least not now.