Wooing my Bodyguard Wife

Jingwei stewed in uneasy silence on the drive home. There were many reasons why this idea of his father's was bloody terrible, and the biggest on top of that long list was the fact that she wasn't qualified.

He was over a head taller than her, with broader shoulders and more developed muscles. If he wished, he could throw her over his back and drag her away. How can someone like that be his bodyguard?

If she had to protect him from gunshots, they'd both be dead because the gunman would simply aim higher to shoot his brains out after they shot her!

He gnashed his teeth, upset with the way his father easily manipulated the situation in his favour. Sure, he hasn't been a prodigal son (okay, he hasn't even been a normal son, but at least he wasn't that unfilial), but that didn't mean his father could treat him like a disobedient dog that needed constant minding!

It's one thing to manipulate him (he had grown up in this family and was used to this strange notion of affection), it was another thing to drag an entirely innocent person involved in his mess.

Well. Not entirely innocent. But Xue Ning was something more than an innocent bystander, she was his saviour, and now his father was going to sink his teeth into her.

A secret bodyguard? That was rubbish. He knew it, she knew it, his father knew it. His father wanted to find a babysitter for him.

He wanted to make Xue Ning his own, the same way all of Jingwei's past 'secretaries' and 'personal assistants' and even some of his 'friends' were all his father's people to begin with, merely hanging around Jingwei to report his actions to his father.

Jingwei had taken great pleasure in creating trouble for them to report, even making a sizable number of them quit in regret. Unfortunately, it had also turned his reputation into one of a ridiculous playboy with no sense or limits, and he could only do more outrageous things to hold up his reputation.

And now someone, or a group of very angry people, want to ruin him for it.

He laughed, because he would be crying at the sheer irony of it all. His perfect brother shot him a look of concern over his phone. Probably reporting to Father that Jingwei was laughing like a loon in the car.

His phone beeps with a message. Was that his father?

Nope.

Strangely enough, it was an unknown number - but he could tell the message was from Xue Ning, because she wrote down her name before threatening him. How precious.

'This is Xue Ning, nice to meet you. DO NOT make me lose this chance to become a real bodyguard YOU'LL REGRET IT!'

She even added a bunch of angry emojis with a dagger behind. He smiles and types out a response.

From Jingwei:

'Oh please, you are so untrained in intimidation! You need to do a lot better than to scare me! You're not even using the right emoji.'

He eagerly adds a bunch of grenade stickers and explosion emojis. He paid for these sticker sets. It felt good that they finally made their debut. He didn't have a chance to use them before.

From Xue Ning:

Xue Ning's next message is just 20 of the same explosion emoji. There were no fancy stickers, but she did upload a picture of a man's middle finger. It definitely was too thick to be hers. He cackles.

From Jingwei:

'Ohohoho so impolite and naughty~ Mis Li is a bad girl eh? Taking photos of random men's middle fingers to use?'

From Xue Ning:

'IT'S YOUR MIDDLE FINGER!'

From Jingwei:

'Oh. You're right? Been taking pictures of MY HANDS SECRETLY??? You only had to ask darling, I'd let you.'

From Xue Ning:

'NO YOU DUMBASS I GOT IT FROM THE INTERNET'

'ALSO YOU SHUT UP OR THIS WILL BE YOU'

Dagger emojis follow her message and an emoji of a face with crossed eyes. Jingwei does not need to be a genius to guess who it could refer to, but the urge to tease her is still stronger than his sense of self-preservation, so he does not reply with an apology.

From Jingwei:

'Wrong~! That's more likely to be YOU, darling! I'm taller, broader, handsomer and richer… you'll be dying first if someone does shoot me!'

He knows the sing-song tone of his message along with the pet names would irritate her further. It's best that she becomes irritated and gives up on this stupid plan. He can simply cause another bigger scandal to make everyone forget about the earlier scandal with her. It worked fine for him so far.

From Xue Ning:

'Idiot. Being bigger just means that there's more of you to hit. More importantly: NOT YOUR DARLING'

From Jingwei:

'You're supposed to PROTECT me from getting hit, darling. Oops. If not darling, what about dearest?'

From Xue Ning:

'I'll claim it was an accident, seeing that I am 'untrained in intimidation' and need practice to become more intimidating.'

'Call me that and you can say goodbye to celebrating Father's Day for good!'

Jingwei laughs. This is fun.

From Jingwei:

'My dear, you have more luck trying to teach kittens to imitate sabertooth tigers. The saber tooth tigers are extinct for now, in case you didn't know.

And don't say that - you're depriving my father of celebrating with me? For shame, my dear Miss Li. For shame.'

He includes a crying sticker of a kitten for added punch. It kind of looks like her.

From Xue Ning:

'I KNOW THE SABERTOOTH TIGERS ARE EXTINCT. And what do you mean FOR NOW? Is your family doing some weird experiments to bring them back to life or something?'

'That's not what I meant and you know it! I'm going to end your Sun family line!'

More dagger emojis follow her statement.

From Jingwei:

'SSSSHHH that will ruin the surprise~ besides I'm sure you'll love to feed the tigers in my stead… seeing that you'll be PROTECTING ME'

'You'll have to castrate my brother first. He already lost his sense of humour so make sure to be gentle with him.'

He adds a winking sticker of someone blowing a kiss. Ah, what would he give to see her reaction in person!

"Why are you smiling creepily to yourself?" His brother asks warily. "You're not thinking of escaping from the car right?

"No? Ge, our car is reinforced with titanium and the windows are made of super plexiglass. If I could escape, I'd be Superman." He shrugs to himself.

Maybe he could escape if he had a sabertooth tiger. Hopefully Xue Ning would utterly hate it and realise being his bodyguard was a terrible decision and then quit with a hefty severance package that Jingwei would give so she can live out the rest of her life… doing what?

He didn't know. This lack of knowledge itched at him oddly.

He waited for a reply.

From Xue Ning:

'Feed your own tigers. Your pets - your responsibility!'

'Also, gross. I DO NOT need to think of your brother in this manner. That poor man is already working on a Sunday.'

Jingwei frowns. Why was she thinking about Tianwei to begin with? That thought made his chest itch. Must be allergies.

From Jingwei:

'What about poor me?'

From Xue Ning:

'What about the tigers?'

From Jingwei:

'WHAT ABOUT POOR ME'

He throws in a sad puppy eye sticker. Xue Ning responds and she is unmoved.

From Xue Ning:

'ANSWER MY QUESTION ABOUT THE TIGERS'

"Stop looking at your phone," Tianwei scolds. "We're arriving soon. You'd better prepare yourself for meeting Father, he's less than happy with your behaviour."

"We are?" Jingwei looks up, surprised. Their car was a BMW, and their chauffeur had ten years of experience, which meant the ride was incredibly smooth, but Jingwei could not recall when time flew so quickly when he was forced to return to the mansion.

It usually dragged on intolerably, like malt candy on a hot day.

Huh, guess texting Xue Ning distracted him more than he realised. But now that his brother had dragged him back, he could only think about the eventual confrontation.

"Jokes on you Ge, when has daddy dearest ever been happy with my behaviour?" Jingwei regrettably puts his phone away, yawning at his brother's disgruntled look.

"When you behave like this it's no wonder he's unhappy. Stop causing trouble and arguing against him!"

"I'm trying! This time I'm really innocent!" He protests, feeling wronged.

"Ge knows, and I've sent the information to our Father," Tianwei replies. "Our investigation team should come up with a few leads by the end of the week."

"I hope so," Jingwei sighs as he sees the familiar metal gates of the mansion loom in front of him. The car makes a slow steady drive through the winding path. The ginkgo trees that lined the pathway were beautiful, and visitors would stop and gawk, but all Jingwei felt was quiet dread as the tree branches cast shadows over his face.

The joy he felt from Xue Ning's text was steadily leaking away like oil from a car engine, and replaced with the stifling smell of exhaust fumes.He steels himself for yet another exhausting encounter where he would be once again told that he was a deficient son and a good-for-nothing wastrel.

'Well, it's not like I never heard something like this before. I can handle it.' He thinks to himself consolingly.

He enters the room, only to get smacked in the face with a cup of tea!