Harem God: Leveling Up Yanderes in the Apocalypse

Leon and the Dainty Death Squad enjoyed a delightful meal in the new communal eating area in Maple Street Park, the heart of their budding civilization.

The group ate wildly delicious bread bowls that showcased the full might of the ten food mages. While Mindy ran the kitchen, the ten mages could cook for a thousand people with shoddy equipment and poor ingredients and still create masterpieces.

After the meal, Leon stood atop a new wooden speaking platform overlooking the area, built for announcements.

"I have a really long speech for you, so get comfortable." Leon said with a slight smile.

Everyone calmed down with serious expressions, prepared to listen. Some liked the man, others feared him, but regardless of one's standing, everyone respected him.

"There's a new bathhouse. Thank Layla, Klash, Tanya, the water mages, electricians, and architects." He said with a calm voice, "Now use it."

Leon got off stage and walked back to his table to help his partners up.

The haremites were stunned-silent, uncertain what had just happened. His speech was so absurd that they thought there was a catch.

Seeing their reluctance, he panned his gaze across their faces.

"This is where you cheer and have the best bath of your life." Leon announced with a wide grin.

Dead silence. A chuckle. Then another. Someone screamed in excitement, and Maple Street Park exploded in a delirious flurry of cheers and whistles.

"Come on, Ladies. Show these women to the bathhouse." He requested. The Dainty Death Squad fell silent, and everyone blinked a few times.

"Aren't you coming?" Tricksie asked.

"Anyone can join [me] when I go to the bathhouse, but I'm not joining [anyone] to the bathhouse." Leon explained, "So we'll find a time to bathe together. However, for tonight you're the representatives of Harem City leading our troops into a sudsy battle."

The haremites listened quietly. Everyone was waiting for the Dainty Death Squad to lead the way, afraid to be the first to enter. So everyone heard the conversation.

"Hey! Does anyone have a problem with Leon joining?" Tricksie yelled at full volume.

"I don't don't." Kazz replied straightly.

"I'd love it." Foxy said with slightly narrowed eyes.

"I don't mind…." One of the beast women said before another dozen joined her.

"I do!" Leon yelled in a loud girly voice, "Let's establish boundaries everyone's comfortable with if the haremites decide that it's okay for him to join later! Let's be selfish tonight and not think about the guy!"

The haremites burst into bewildered laughter, which got more aggressive when they saw the Dainty Death Squad pouting with puffed-out cheeks. The women looked excessively cute, so their pouting made them look absurdly adorable.

"I promise you all a cosmic bathhouse experience that would make Aphrodite blush later." Leon whispered to his women, making them all blush, "So let me enjoy a little free time, yeah?"

Lindy dry swallowed and rubbed her legs together. "Okay, if you insist."

"I do." He replied charmingly, making their eyes sparkle, "Now go. Lead our women into the bathhouse."

They all nodded reluctantly.

The first to adapt, as always, was Caitlyn. While she was the most aggressive yandere imaginable, she would follow Leon's orders unconditionally, even if they hurt or killed her.

"You heard your esteemed leader!" Caitlyn yelled, "So march!"

Leon's eyes widened in shock. He didn't mean for her to lead the women to the bathhouse with real marching! Before he could correct her, Mirth got involved.

"Orderly rows, women!" The olive-skinned canine woman yelled, "If she says march, we march! So line up and follow my direction!"

Leon watched everyone awkwardly develop into formations with a wry smile.

He wanted the Beef My Wasteland: Bathhouse Special to showcase women tramping over each other with unhealthily ecstatic faces. Instead, he had a military leader marching confused women to the bathhouse, led by a yandere taking her job far too seriously.

"For the record," Leon said to the sky, "this was a genuine accident. However, I'd like to point out that we can maintain law and order. You're welcome in advance."

He laughed to himself as he walked back to his tent to enjoy the first time alone he had since Caitlyn woke up a week ago.

Meanwhile, Layla stood at the bathhouse door to check everyone in—in yoga pants.

Caitlyn harumphed at her cutely as she walked through the door, leaving Layla with a wry smile.

However, she should've been grateful for the snub because one member had no problem speaking her mind. Unfiltered.

"Omigod, those pants are, like, so cute!" Lindy cried in a cheery, mocking voice.

Layla's eyes deadened instantly. "You all wanted me to wear this shit. Now you're mocking me for it?"

"What an accusation. We're not mocking you for wearing yoga pants like every other woman ever." The brunette smirked, "We're giggling because you're a 'lesbian with a shaved head' following the advice of a… hmmm… 'idiot.' Yeah, that's who you're following."

The woman turned away bitterly. "I was wrong. I'll tell Leon, now fuck off."

Lindy's eyes widened in astonishment. "Plus 20 points for willingness to admit you're wrong to others. Another 5 for enjoying yoga pants and proving you're a human. Lastly, 37 points for creating the bathhouse."

Layla narrowed her eyes in confusion as the brunette tallied points with an invisible pen, writing on her hand. She had no idea what was going on.

"I'll add another three points because I hate off numbers." The brunette continued. Then she looked up at the woman with a slight smirk.

"Congratulations. You just upped your reputation value by sixty points in one stretch." Lindy said with a cheery smile.

Layla blinked twice in awkward confusion. "Is… that a good thing?"

"Certainly." The brunette smiled, "Upping your reputation is always a plus. It's also critical when you have a deficit of 372, minus sixty… 312."

The woman thought she couldn't care less about the brunette's reputation system. However, once she heard such an extreme number, she couldn't help but care!

"Wait, What? How did I end up with negative 372 reputation points!?" Layla snapped in bafflement.

"You were rude to Leon." Lindy replied dismissively.

The shaven-headed woman stared at the brunette in confusion. "Have I offended him before?"

Lindy gave her a bright smile. "Nope. Just this once."

Layla couldn't believe her ears. "I called him an idiot once like I do everyone else, and you're discounting my entire personality?"

"Of course." The brunette said with a bright smile, "As far as I'm concerned, anyone that doesn't love Leon has a bad taste and deserves to die."

The woman blinked twice. "You're kidding, right? Look, don't kill me, okay?"

"Tisk, tisk, lady!" Lindy giggled while waging her finger, "Leon would never allow such a thing. Minus sixty-one reputation points for doubting Leon."

She pulled out her invisible pad again and aggressively crossed out the original number.

Layla watched the scene in horrified disbelief. The woman, laden in her silky green cocktail dress with a large bow, looked like a horrifying child born from the ashes of the Salem Witch Trials!

When Lindy went to give the woman another charming smile, a blond in a cute pink dress with a red bow in her hair grabbed the brunette by the scalp and started dragging her away.

Since Caitlyn didn't show intent to harm the brunette, the action was allowed.

"WOAH! Woah, woah, woah! What has your panties in a bunch, Caitlyn!?" Lindy cried.

Layla sighed a breath of relief when the blonde came to her aid.

"Leon told us to lead our troops into a sudsy battle, didn't he?" Caitlyn growled.

Lindy turned downward with a downcast expression. "Yes. But, woman, disrespect, Leon…."

"Susdy battle, troops, Leon, yes?" Caitlyn replied mockingly.

"What's going on?" Layla whispered with half-clouded eyes.

"Yes. Leon, sudsy battle. Got it." Lindy bitterly whined while marching into the bathhouse dramatically.

"Um, thanks, Caitlyn." Layla said hesitantly.

Caitlyn gave the woman an icy glare. "Don't distract Lindy again. If you stand between us and Leon's objectives again, you won't be able to regret it."

You cannot regret something if you're dead; that was the insinuation.

The blonde whipped her ponytail and strode into the bathhouse with the confidence of a general.

"They're insane." Layla said with trembling eyes, "They're certifiably insane."

She immediately decided that she would never disrespect Leon again.

"I think you look cute!" A woman called out.

Layla turned her neck to the woman with the fluidity of a rusted cog. When she finally completed the rotation, she found herself staring at yet another cute dress, this one orange.

The woman had a hazel layered bob cut with a cute yellow hair clip. She wore black clogs on her feet.

It was Reina, who was aggressively agreeable and cute. However, Layla was mildly traumatized by cute clothing after her last two conversations. So when she saw the awkward woman kicking her feet with a carefree smile, she dry-swallowed.

"Personally, I think you're looking at the situation wrong, miss." Reina said with a carefree smile.

Layla dry swallowed. "What do you mean?"

Reina swung her arms around, slightly twirling her dress while averting eye contact.

"It's not that difficult. We love Leon. So we'll protect you unconditionally if you're nice to Leon and he likes you." She commented with a mellow smile.

The woman's eyes widened in understanding. It was a very simple equation: be kind to Leon, and there are no problems.

Beyond that, she'd get full protection; perhaps the situation was to her benefit.

Reina clasped her hands together and unclasped them twirling her dresses with a breezy expression.

"Of course, if you're mean to Leon or he hates you, you'll be dead rather quickly." She said casually while looking at her shoes, "I like you, so promise me you won't make us kill you. Kay?"

She looked up at Layla with a sincere gaze. There was no malice in her eyes whatsoever—that was what was terrifying.

The idea she'd casually transform from an extremely agreeable, quirky woman into a murder machine to dispose of her quickly on Leon's behalf was mentally traumatizing.

"Y-Yes. I promise." Layla gulped nervously.

"Really?" Reina said with a beaming smile, "I'm glad. I love your yoga pants, by the way. They look extremely comfortable."

"T-They are. Extremely comfortable. In fact, I'm in love with them." The shaven-headed woman stammered.

"I am too. It's nice to see you doing something against your reputation." The cute brunette smiled cutely.

"Personally, I think being a free-willed woman means liking what you like and doing whatever you want.

If you don't like girly stuff, that's cool and all. But if you like girly stuff, you're expressing your free will, yeah?

If you deny that because you're worried about men's perception of you, it's kinda like you're admitting that you need their approval to feel okay. You know?

I don't know, just a weird thought. Don't mind me; I'm just a bit random sometimes."

Layla's eyes trembled in confusion at the strange shift in topic. However, she found the insight awkwardly insightful. "That's true, in a vacuum. But women interact with men in the workforce and have to earn respect, so it's not that simple."

Reina twirled her dress back and forth. "I suppose you're right. I don't know. Maybe I just feel this way because the apocalypse hit, we killed all the men mercilessly, and now there are only women here. You know?"

The woman blinked twice at the casual reminder that they slaughtered all the men. She was a survivor, so she was on ground zero when it happened. "Y-Yes. That's a good point."

"You think so? I do too." Reina remarked with a bright smile.

"It's nice that there are only women around. Now there's only one man, and you don't have to impress him. He couldn't care less about you if you don't get in his way or threaten us.

He's really hard to offend, so you don't have to worry about him, and feel free to make decisions based on your desires. I think that's great."

Layla's eye's glided to the left. It was remarkable, and Leon was extremely difficult to disturb unless it regarded his phobia.

"Right…. He doesn't have emotions, so it's pretty much impossible to offend him unless I attack him. So I'm safe from those two… killing me, right?" She asked nervously.

"Yup! You're right about that." Reina said with a bright smile, "He won't let us kill anyone that isn't his enemy even when we really, really want to. So don't worry about that."

She kicked around her shoes a few more times.

"And you're right. It's nearly impossible to get on his bad side. That's why if you do, you… kinda deserve to die a brutal death. You know? I don't know. That's just how I see things."

Layla's heart pounded awkwardly, giving her chest pain from the acute stress that hit her like a brick out of the blue.

"Y-Yes." She said reflexively. Her fight-or-flight response got cranked to the maximum, and her brain told her not to contradict the cute woman.

"Really? I think so too." Reina said with a beaming smile, "I like you. I feel like you get me. Anyway, I gotta go. Caitlyn is giving me a mean look, so I'll see you later!"

"S-See you later." Layla stuttered.

Reina ran into the bathhouse house door but turned around at the last moment.

"And don't forget your promise, kay?" She requested.

Layla gulped in horror. "O-Of course now."

"You're the best. See you soon!" Reina said while running inside.

—

[A/N: There needed to be a good yandere scene before the naked sudsy battle ;)

I'm releasing my new dual cultivation apocalypse novel, [Playboy Cultivator in the Apocalypse], today! I'm releasing 14 chapters today, so consider getting some free apocalyptic comedy in. There's a short synopsis of the novel in the author's thought.

As always, thanks for reading, everyone! ]