Memory Lost

Chapter 132: I Want to Kill Part 1

Su Mian follows Han Chen back to the scene of the explosion and to the side of the window.

It’s got a big hole with not much left; only a bit of the curtain is still stuck on the blackened wall. Han Chen reaches out his hand with black gloves on. He touches the edge of the big hole and turns to her, “Can you see anything?”

His voice is light and emotionless, carrying a calming tone. Su Mian lifts her slightly red eyes and looks around. She says without certainty, “The curtains were open?”

She was too emotional at the time, but now that she thinks about it, she vaguely remembers that there was always light shining through the room that Xu Si Bai was in. It was completely different from the dark room that Zhou Xiao Zhuan was in.

Han Chen nods. He knocks on the window frame lightly looking at the buildings across. The sun is shining brightly; many of the buildings’ windows are reflecting the light from the sun, blinding their eyes right now.

“And the traffic lights,” he says.

Su Mian is stunned slightly. Her gaze turns serious, “Yes, and the traffic lights.”

A decision of life and death, at a time of difficulty, yet they were met with a red light that would not turn green, preventing them from turning right. Thinking about it more carefully now, the red light was abnormally long. They noticed it at the time and if they really wanted to, they could have insisted on making the turn and force the pedestrian to make way for them.

But their opponent is clearly very good at grasping other people’s minds. In that kind of situation, slight differences in the surroundings can sway one’s mind, prompting them to make the hard decision and choose to save Zhou Xiao Zhuan.

“The one they wanted to kill from the start may have been Xu Si Bai,” Han Chen turns around and looks at her, “but why?”

“It means that Xu Si Bai deserves to die more,” Su Mian answers swiftly.

“Why does Xu Si Bai deserve to die more?” Han Chen asks.

Su Mian doesn’t answer.

They look directly into each other’s eyes. Han Chen takes off his gloves, grabs her hand, squeezes it a little, turns around to look outside of the window, and tilts his chin a slightly, “That building.”

Su Mian looks at the tall building not far away. She thinks for a moment and her eyes gleam, “You’re not suspecting that A was watching Xu Si Bai from that building, are you?”

“Mm. There’s a paradox here, and only your criminal psychology can explain it.”

Su Mian nods, “Opening the curtains was completely unnecessary. Zhou Xiao Zhuan’s room didn’t have its windows opened. If Awanted to kill Xu Si Bai and always loved watching the moment of his victims die, he would definitely not care about Zhou Xiao Zhuan’s side of things. It’s possible that at the time, he was hiding in a safe and convenient place to watch over this place. He used a telescope to watch Xu Si Bai. Therefore, the windows in this room were open and so were the curtains. This way, it can give him a good view. And that building over there is the best spot.”

Su Mian nods, “Opening the curtains was completely unnecessary. Zhou Xiao Zhuan’s room didn’t have its windows opened. If Awanted to kill Xu Si Bai and always loved watching the moment of his victims die, he would definitely not care about Zhou Xiao Zhuan’s side of things. It’s possible that at the time, he was hiding in a safe and convenient place to watch over this place. He used a telescope to watch Xu Si Bai. Therefore, the windows in this room were open and so were the curtains. This way, it can give him a good view. And that building over there is the best spot.”

She pauses and then realizes something, “No wonder the bomb still exploded after it was removed. Everybody thought that was an accident, but thinking about it now, it might be A’s doing. He’s a person who admits defeat. He probably wouldn’t go back on his words and kill Xu Si Bai after watching him escape, but he probably felt upset and detonated the bomb remotely to express his anger.”

“I think so too,” Han Chen says. He reaches out his hand to hold her shoulder and guides her out of the room, “There’s a criminal investigation team sent to examine the place, so let’s go take a look.”

Su Mian walks with him while frowning her eyebrows, “But they’ve always been very careful. Would it be like before where no traces are left behind?”

Han Chen actually smiles. His side profile looks indifferent and calm, “Su Mian, they are humans and not Gods, and they don’t have remarkable powers. Every crime that seems to be committed intricately and leaves no traces behind requires great planning. Furthermore, I’ve said before that even if this is true, they’ve only wiped away the evidence that is within our viewing range. It’s just hiding in places that they think we can’t see. Wherever they go, it’s impossible for them to erase their traces every step of the way, control all surveillance cameras and witnesses——this city isn’t owned by them. The video from last time that almost led us to catch L is the prime example. This time is the same. A daringly hid at a place that is only tens of meters away with officers all around the area. He must think that we would never find it.”

_____

It’s already 9 to 10 pm when they return to the dorm.

Due to what happened today, the security bureau has raised the importance level of maintaining the safety of the Black Shield Team and other criminal investigators. Starting today, everybody will be assigned a weapon to be carried 24 hours and are asked to stay at the dorms overnight as much as possible.

Han Chen is taking a shower. Su Mian sits by the window and oversees the chilly night sky; she stares at it for a long while.

It’s not until Han Chen comes out of the bathroom that Su Mian turns her head and sees him stand by the bed. His damp hair and fair white face. He has pulled on a gray colored sweater and a pair of black lounge pants, making his legs look even longer. He turns around and looks at her.

It’s not until Han Chen comes out of the bathroom that Su Mian turns her head and sees him stand by the bed. His damp hair and fair white face. He has pulled on a gray colored sweater and a pair of black lounge pants, making his legs look even longer. He turns around and looks at her.

Su Mian stares at him for a while before turning her head back to the window.

“Han Chen, to me, Xu Si Bai is the same as Xiao Zhuan. They are my family. That is why I worried about him so much today,” she looks down and smiles to herself, “In these past years, I don’t have family or friends and seem to have a hard time getting close to anyone. I don’t like to talk about my lost memory either. I’ve been close to Xiao Zhuan probably because we share the same interests. As for Xu Si Bai……” she pauses feeling a little stunned, “it’s probably because I could sense that he’s just as lonely as I am.”

At the end of her sentence, she feels her waist being grabbed; she’s already in his embrace.

Han Chen hugs her from behind, leaning against her with his warm body. This familiar intimacy makes Su Mian’s heart pound. He lowers his head and breathes into her ear while rubbing his face against her cheek. The subtle scent of the man encases her immediately.

“You think that I’ve been living a good life in these few years?” his deep and slightly raspy voice says.

Su Mian remains quiet. She holds onto his hands that are grabbing onto her waist; very lightly and carefully caresses the back of them.

“Who can compare to my love for you?” his voice is deep and stubborn, “What can Xu Si Bai compare to me with?”

Su Mian turns around and hugs him. The moonlight is blurry and the lights are sparsely lit. The two of them stand there quietly. He holds her face with his palms, lowers his head and kisses her. She wraps her arms around him, closes her eyes and feels his touch and affection. A few words come out while they lock lips; it’s all filled with her responses to his love.

I love you……I love you, Han Chen.

Su Mian turns around and hugs him. The moonlight is blurry and the lights are sparsely lit. The two of them stand there quietly. He holds her face with his palms, lowers his head and kisses her. She wraps her arms around him, closes her eyes and feels his touch and affection. A few words come out while they lock lips; it’s all filled with her responses to his love.

I love you……I love you, Han Chen.

Please believe me that I’m also determined to love you and only you.

_____

In the same night, it’s already late at night when Xu Si Bai returns to the dorm.

Compared to Zhou Xiao Zhuan’s injuries, he only has scratches and bruises on top of a minor concussion from the car accident. He’s supposed to stay in the hospital, but he insists on returning home. The criminal investigator who’s in charge of protecting him couldn’t argue back, so he accompanies him on his way home.

The building is quiet as he walks upstairs. There’s not a room that is lit; it’s as if everybody is asleep. He passes by Su Mian’s room without stopping. It’s very quiet inside, so they must be sleeping.

His dorm room has been assigned to him temporarily since he arrived in City Lan. The decor inside is the simplest kind that you can think of. Other than a few clothes inside the closet, there’s a shelf full of books.

He pushes open the door. Every part of his body hurts. Perhaps due to being exhausted, his head feels heavy, but he doesn’t go straight to bed to sleep. Instead, he makes his way to the couch slowly and leans against it for a while. He fetches for a cigarette and lights it up.

One after the other.