The Tales of an Infinite Regressor

[Translator – Asura]

[Proofreader – Gun]

Chapter 77 – Promotion I

1

Speaking of wishes, the truth is that I am more accustomed to receiving wishes than making them.

[Time Seal]

This is my unique awakening ability and the reason behind my moniker as the Doctor Jang. It allows me to trap someone in their “happiest day,” making them relive that day endlessly.

– “Doctor Jang, it’s too hard. I want to let go of life now.”

– “Please, Doctor Jang.”

– “I want to see my family again. When the world was still normal… Please.”

– “No one will remember me in reality? I don’t care. This reality is…”

Though they repeat the same day forever, those trapped by [Time Seal] never realize it. Even if someone, like soccer player Kim Joocheol from a previous turn, happens to notice, it doesn’t matter. They forget again quickly.

People just need to enjoy the amusement park I set up in their dreams with a free pass ticket for the whole day.

To the ruined humanity of this apocalyptic world, I am essentially the last legally sanctioned sedative (with narcotic properties).

Naturally, there is no shortage of people waiting in line to get a free pass to this amusement park.

Today, let me introduce the craziest psychopath among those in line.

2

“Vice Guild Leader.”

“Hmm?”

“I’m so miserable.”

Swoosh.

Silver hair flowed down across from me at the drinking table.

Her hair was beautiful. Too white to be called gray and too shiny to be simply white. So, it could only be described as silver.

When an awakened individual gains their power, their hair color changes randomly. The person before me had drawn an SR-grade from a limited gacha (for reference, mine was normal black).

“Honestly, I can’t bear it any longer with a sane mind. I want to let go of everything and end it.”

“……”

Yoo Jiwon.

Such a person exists.

Actually, Yoo Jiwon’s name has come up several times in my stories. Some readers might remember, but this was her first appearance.

– “Vice Guild Leader, do you have time now? There’s a guest here to see you.”

– “A guest? Who?”

– “Well, the name is… Emile… Schopenhauer? They say he’s German?”

On the day I first met the old Schopenhauer.

The one who first informed me that this historical figure had come was none other than Yoo Jiwon, the SSS-grade beautiful hair, and my secretary and deputy.

That’s right. Secretary and deputy. Long ago, when I was still a lackey in the Three Thousand Worlds under the Great Witch Tang Seorin, Yoo Jiwon was my subordinate. As the lackey of the highest supreme guild leader, she already had quite a high rank.

Let me share how she quickly became part of the core of our inner circle.

During the 5th turn, Yoo Jiwon once said to me out of the blue:

“Vice Guild Leader, do you like the Romance of the Three Kingdoms?”

“What? You too?”

“Yes. I got into it through Yokoyama’s Strategic Romance of the Three Kingdoms, the 60-volume series, when I was young.”

My eyes widened. What a foundation!

The cool, expressionless awakened individual with silver hair continued to recite her list with just her lips moving.

“After that, I explored Go Yeong’s Romance of the Three Kingdoms, Hwang Seok-young’s Romance of the Three Kingdoms, Lee Mun-yeol’s Romance of the Three Kingdoms, and Jang Jeong-il’s Romance of the Three Kingdoms. I even had a dark history where I was into a demonic work called ‘Analysis of the Romance of the Three Kingdoms’ but later transitioned to the original ‘Records of the Three Kingdoms’.”

[PR/N: All people who had different takes on Romance of the Three Kingdoms, you could check them out if you’re interested.]

“I can’t believe this.”

I was dizzy with a drug-like euphoria.

Is this how a martial arts elder feels when seeing a promising young disciple?

I couldn’t hide my trembling voice as I asked a test question to see if this child was truly the successor to my legacy.

“Koei…? Or, Total War…?”

“Hmm.”

Like those who exchange Zen riddles, Yoo Jiwon stroked her chin in contemplation.

Finally, she lifted her glasses.

“My rational mind calls for Total War, but my young heart shouts Koei. And I believe the soul lies more in the heart than the mind.”

“…Favorite series?”

“Romance of the Three Kingdoms III, Romance of the Three Kingdoms V, Romance of the Three Kingdoms XI.”

“Ugh…!”

I had to surrender to the impeccable integrity of my successor. From this moment, Yoo Jiwon was immediately promoted to my inner circle.

Of course, there was one final hurdle.

“Well, isn’t this grand. Look at them, everyone.”

The Three Thousand Worlds advocated for an autocratic monarchy instead of the globally outdated democratic government. Naturally, personnel decisions were also the exclusive right of the guild leader.

Our highest supreme, the Great Witch Tang Seorin, smirked as she glanced back and forth between me and Yoo Jiwon.

“You’re saying the guild will run smoothly if you hire her as your secretary and deputy just because she’s a Three Kingdoms otaku?”

“A witch otaku and railfan saying that…”

“Hmm? What did you just say, Vice Guild Leader?”

“It’s nothing.”

“I get that the Deputy Guild Master likes you, but you can’t just promote guild members willy-nilly without following procedures and protocols. Seriously, why would someone who should know better do that? Do you think Yoo Jiwon will feel at ease with such a promotion? Her peers will be giving him the evil eye and she’ll feel the pressure.”

“Pardon me, Grand Witch. May I speak?”

Yoo Jiwon said.

As described several times, Yoo Jiwon always wore a stoic expression and spoke with precise formality. No matter how nonsensical her words, once they left her lips, they always sounded plausible.

“Yes? What is it?”

“I was not recommended for the Deputy Guild Master’s assistant position simply because I possess knowledge of the Three Kingdoms. Grand Witch, I have other useful skills as well.”

“What, your awakening ability? Like a minimap? I know that. I do hold you in high regard. But I keep telling you, an organization needs procedures and protocols…”

“I majored in Latin and can write fluently in it. Naturally, I can also translate song lyrics into Latin.”

“Promotion.”

Yoo Jiwon, promoted to an executive!

3

While Yoo Jiwon’s promotion to the inner circle was indeed due to her knowledge of the Three Kingdoms and her proficiency in Latin, it didn’t mean she was lacking as an awakened individual. In fact, she was quite competent.

“Jiwon.”

“Yes, Deputy Guild Master.”

“It seems we should start the operation. Could you activate your minimap?”

“Understood.”

Minimap

This was Yoo Jiwon’s awakening ability. Any Korean who had once sold their soul to the game Starcraft would immediately understand what a ‘minimap’ is just by hearing its three-syllable name.

Swish—

Yoo Jiwon spread out a map on the operations table. The scale was 1:50,000. She placed chess pieces she had prepared in advance onto the map, which was printed on simple paper.

Amazingly, the chess pieces began to move on their own.

“Deputy Guild Master, the enemy is gathering in the eastern district as expected. It appears they plan to ambush us from behind using boats.”

“Hm.”

Each seemingly ordinary chess piece had a red sticker with names like ‘Kim Sung-woo’ and ‘Park Hyun-mo’ written on it. These were the names of the enemy leaders we were up against.

The chess pieces mimicked the exact locations and movements of the enemies on the map. It wasn’t just the enemies, either.

♝ ♛

Yoo Jiwon Tang Seorin

The bishop with Yoo Jiwon’s name and the queen labeled Tang Seorin also showed their precise locations on the map.

Tang Seorin was impressed.

“It really feels like fighting with a minimap on. Isn’t this ability totally broken? Since Jiwon joined our guild, guild wars have become so much easier.”

“You flatter me, Grand Witch.”

Bowing with perfect social grace, Yoo Jiwon made sure her gesture was neither too exaggerated nor too humble.

“My ability has its limitations. Without your leadership, Grand Witch, my ability would be useless.”

“Come on, that’s too much. Moderate it, or I might just sew your mouth shut.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Yoo Jiwon’s flattery and humility might have been insincere, but the ‘minimap’ ability did have some flaws.

1. The minimap could only display the locations of individuals whom Yoo Jiwon had met and whose names she knew.

For instance, she couldn’t show the location of the ‘Saintess’ because she had never met her and didn’t know her name.

2. The minimap only worked in cities that Yoo Jiwon had personally visited.

For example, in her fifth life, Yoo Jiwon had never been to Gyeongju. Despite her hobby of cross-country cycling in Korea and even touring Japan, she had never set foot there.

Therefore, no matter how she used the [minimap], she couldn’t track anyone who escaped to Gyeongju.

In such cases, the chess pieces would move up to a point and then fall flat once they reached the edge of the map.

The phrase ‘visited a city’ might seem vague, but it had a surprisingly clear criterion: visiting a convenience store in that city.

[Translator – Asura]

[Proofreader – Gun]

Oddly enough, simply buying something or staying for more than a minute at a convenience store in a city made it count as ‘visited’.

So, cities where convenience stores had completely disappeared could never be ‘visited’. For example, in New York, which had turned into a wasteland due to the arrival of a colossal anomaly, there was no way to find a convenience store.

So?

“Guild Master, I’ll keep attending various guild leader gatherings with Jiwon and travel around the country.”

“Sure, I’ll leave it to you.”

I took Yoo Jiwon around the country under the guise of his secretary, diligently helping her familiarize himself with people’s faces.

As a result, the “vast network” that Yoo Jiwon had built through me was fully projected onto the map of the entire Korean peninsula.

“Great job.”

Looking down at the large map, I popped open a beer bottle.

Prominent guild leaders in each city, individuals with special abilities even if they weren’t guild leaders, and those who could potentially influence the power dynamics of the Korean peninsula.

The real-time locations of all prominent figures were being displayed.

“Thank you. It’s all thanks to you, Deputy Guild Master.”

“Well, you were born with good skills. And you made a good choice of major.”

“To be honest, I never expected my Latin major to shine even more after the world ended. When civilization was intact, I worried about starving to death.”

“Don’t be so modest, will you?”

I slowly poured beer for Yoo Jiwon as she casually extended her arm. We celebrated the completion of the “national map” by raising our glasses.

“Cheers.”

“Cheers.”

Clang— the glass chimed beautifully.

With Tang Seorin’s leadership, my advisory skills, and Yoo Jiwon’s overwhelming information prowess, the Three Thousand Worlds prospered.

And so, the invincible triumvirate lived happily ever after… It would be nice if the credits rolled, but as you know, this story is a bit far from a happy ending.

Not long after rising to power in the Korean peninsula, the situation began to darken.

In rounds without Noh Doha, cities self-destructed individually, in rounds without Sword Maiden, food supplies quickly ran out, in rounds without Seo Gyu, awakened individuals lost the very network of communication between them, and in rounds without Old Scho, we had no way to break through the onslaught of anomalies.

Even the leadership of the Three Thousand Worlds, including us, was not exempt. In fact, we might have been worse off.

Tang Seorin was a rarity in the organization of the feudal lord system, more elusive than legendary Pokémon, known as the ‘benevolent ruler’.

Executives had to set an example on the front lines, and if even one guild member went hungry, the executives had to go hungry too.

Tang Seorin endured it. So did I.

Yoo Jiwon found it difficult to endure.

As a character with a cool, stoic demeanor and the letters ‘power’ and ‘success’ written in bold on her heart, Yoo Jiwon couldn’t help but find the situation horrifying.

The more brutal truth was that the Three Thousand Worlds were comparatively better off in the Korean peninsula.

Between the nature of needing to wield power and achieve success no matter where you were and the era that had no intention of fulfilling such nature, Yoo Jiwon agonized, lamented, and despaired.

If there had been a guarantee that she could betray Tang Seorin and join another guild to advance, Yoo Jiwon might have followed the example of Yi Wan-yong, the prime minister of the Great Joseon Empire.

Indeed, Yoo Jiwon was full of thoughts about continuing the legacy of her ancestors.

“Guild Master.”

“Yeah?”

“Could you possibly arrange a ferry to Japan for me?”

I didn’t bother to scold her with something like, “Why run away to Japan? Wouldn’t it be beneath the dignity of someone who’s practically a direct subordinate to the Guild Master?” Instead, I sipped my coffee. By this point, I had somewhat grasped the essence of Yoo Jiwon’s nature as well, as my own shell was starting to crack.

“If you want, I could arrange it, but I can only get you a one-way ticket.”

“What do you mean?”

“Until recently, there were occasional ferries coming over to Busan from Japan. They all disappeared about three months ago. What do you think that means?”

“…?”

We fought with anomalies all over the country after founding the Guild Federation. Jiwon, as my direct subordinate, had always been with me, fighting for the survival of humanity.

“Guild Master, what about China…?”

“Based on the information the Prophet shared last time, it seems Shandong Peninsula is already gone.”

“…?”

“Plus, while your skills work in Korea and Japan because we’ve traveled there by bicycle, you’ve never been to China. Your skills might as well be useless there. Are you okay with that?”

“…?”

Yes. In order to betray, there needs to be a place to receive, and to escape, there needs to be a paradise to flee to.

The era was molding her into a loyal servant.

Like talented individuals born in the wrong era due to a misfire in the gacha, Yoo Jiwon finally admitted that her desires would never be fulfilled forever.

She had nowhere to go. Where could she go, really? The world had completely fallen apart.

Or rather…

In fact, there was only one place left to escape to.

“Guild Master.”

“Oh, really? Hey! Assistant Yoo! What, are you scared? Let’s just die together, pal. Huh? Got anything else going on in life? We’re all doomed anyway, aren’t we?”

“Please kill me.”

I turned my head.

My expressionless assistant was staring at me intently.

“Please hold a funeral for me. Using your abilities, Guild Master. I beg of you.”

“…?”

I sighed.

So far, many had asked me for a funeral—meaning, to ‘seal time’. Yes, among them were those who were personally important to me.

In short, I was a professional funeral director. I had already experienced numerous times the act of sealing away someone close to me like Yoo Jiwon for eternity.

And in our straightforward relationship, I also knew that when a funeral request came, I could provide slightly more detailed customer consultation than usual.

To summarize the consultation, it went something like this:

-You know, I’m a regressor, and when the wheel of time rolls into the next round, the world gets a little better, but do you really want to be stuck in a real coffin?

Upon hearing my secret, Yoo Jiwon was shocked. And Yoo Jiwon’s mental shock lasted exactly six hours.

Not even a day later, my assistant with silver hair came back to me.

“Your Excellency, you said this round is the fifth turn, did you not?”

“…”

Just by looking at the ‘Your Excellency’ appended to my title after hearing the talk about me being a regressor, you could tell that this girl was really something else.

“Right.”

“Yes. Then, wouldn’t it be more beneficial to have a bit more hope in this world from the second turn compared to the first, from the fourth turn to the fifth, and from the fifth turn to the sixth, considering it’s more hopeful than ever before?”

“…I guess so?”

The silver-haired lunatic nodded with an infinitely solemn face.

And then, wouldn’t she start reciting a line that I had never heard in my entire life throughout my entire regressor existence?

“Your Excellency. Then, from my perspective, even if I were to be sealed in time, it would be very detrimental to be sealed in this fifth turn.”

?

[Translator – Asura]

[Proofreader – Gun]